IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problemas, as well as practical problems.

#country #language #problemas
Living abroad has
popularized
Add a missing verb
been popularized
show examples
 during the
last
 decades. It is mainly explained by the necessity of searching for better
oportunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 around the world in order to improve our professional profiles
as well as
visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
show examples
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
breathtaking places. Despite having some drawbacks related to
this
, the advantages outweigh the demerits. In
this
 essay, I will explain my reasons in detail. To start with, there are more than 100 different languages worldwide.
Therefore
, humankind has to learn either the native tongue spoken in the country that will be visited or
english
Change the capitalization
English
show examples
due
Correct word choice
because
show examples
 it is considered the universal language.
Then
,
although
 it used to be
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 stumbling block, nowadays, most people have learnt more than one speech by removing the boundaries to communicate
between
Change preposition
with
show examples
 each other.
Besides
, living overseas helps the population to learn readily a new tongue.
For example
, in the United States, psychologist researchers have shown that the best techniques to learn a new lingo are living in a country
when
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 the language to be learnt is the mother tongue and avoiding speaking their mother speech.
Additionally
, if humanity desires to live abroad, the main cultural characteristics of the region should be learnt in order to be part of
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 specific society.
Therefore
, there are many 'cultural shocks' in all fields because lives are strongly different from the environment where people were raised.
For instance
,
flavours
Correct article usage
the flavours
show examples
 of the food, ways of wearing clothes, and rules and governmental policies vary among countries.
Nevertheless
, managing the cultural variations is a method for acquiring knowledge
as well as
 learning techniques for survival overseas.
For example
, it has been proved that people who live at least once outside their native countries, tend to be more resilient.
To sum up
,
eveyone
Correct your spelling
everyone
 that desires to live overseas should learn how to modify their habits in order to leverage the experience and
finding
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 the easiest ways to struggle against the difficulties.
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
There were minor spelling mistakes such as "opportunities" and "every". Ensure that you proofread your work to avoid these errors.
clarity
Try to use more specific and varied sentence structures to improve readability.
content development
While the essay addresses the prompt, some arguments could be expounded upon further for greater clarity and impact.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.
content development
Good use of examples particularly the one about learning a new language in the United States.
content balance
Attempts to engage with both advantages and disadvantages, showing a well-rounded view on the topic.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: