When ask to choose between a life without work and working most of the time, people would always choose not to work. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
People are said to always have a tendency
of
not Change preposition
to
choosing
to work. The author strongly with Wrong verb form
choose
this
statement due to
passion as well as
stress-relieving activity.
It should be self-aware that most people would continue working out of their own willingness since it is their dream careers
. Particularly, one’s option of a job or an occupation is significantly affected by their own wishes and desperation. Fix the agreement mistake
career
Therefore
, residents getting their suitable career would keep on working so as to satisfy their own desires even if they have retired. This
case can be found among teenagers nowadays who are allowed and supported by their parents to live up with
their dreams. Change preposition
to
Therefore
, employees would stick to their jobs even they
or unnecessary.
Another point Correct word choice
if they
that is
worth mentioning is the ability to distress of
a suitable job. Setting aside passions, many inhabitants are encouraged to continue to work thanks to their colleagues Change preposition
apply
as well as
their comfortable workplace. In other words
, friendly co-workers and satisfying
working environment can be considered as mental cures for human beings who are looking Correct article usage
a satisfying
an
escape from daily problems and family Change preposition
for an
crisis
, resulting in an increasing number of loyal workers. Toyota could be taken as a prime example for Fix the agreement mistake
crises
this
statement where, even in the present, employees are reported to have chosen to stay with their co-workers despite being granted a day off. Hence
, highlighting the importance of work in the current era.
To sum up
, passions
and mental cures are proven to be the key reasons Fix the agreement mistake
passion
of
keeping working. Change preposition
for
Thus
, it is believed that people, more often than not, will choose
continue working provided that they can opt for not doing it.Add the particle
choose to
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Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the clarity of your ideas by structuring your paragraphs more logically. For example, make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve coherence by clearly linking your ideas within and between paragraphs. Using appropriate transition words and phrases can help with this.
Task Achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples that directly support your main points to make your argument more convincing.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task and gives relevant reasons why people might choose to keep working.
Task Achievement
You provide specific examples, such as the Toyota example, which help to illustrate your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion which make the essay more organized.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?