Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn, and should not have to pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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While
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some argue that individuals should preserve their
hand- earned
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hard-earned

The word hand- earned doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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income and avoid paying taxes,
i
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I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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firmly believe that fulfilling
tax
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obligations is crucial
due to
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the numerous benefits it entails. It may not be pleasant to consider giving up a percentage of one's income to the government, but doing so is necessary for the welfare of the country and its people. One of the primary concerns about taxation is the financial burden it
place
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places

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on economically
disadvantage
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disadvantaged

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families, particularly those with
school- aged
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school-aged

The word school- aged seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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children who require significant investment to thrive.
Additionally
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, the government's
lake
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lack

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of transparency and accountability in managing public funds can lead to mistrust among citizens, sparking doubts about the allocation of
tax
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revenue.
Nevertheless
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, it is imperative to balance these worries with the many advantages of taxation.
On the other hand
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,
i
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I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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believe that taking responsibility for
tax
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payments is essential for a nation's development and the
well- being
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well-being

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of its inhabitants. The revenue generated from taxes can be invested in infrastructure development,
such
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as transportation systems and social welfare programs that enhance the quality of life for citizens.
For instance
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, the
admistration
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administration

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can utilize
tax
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funds to provide
tution
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tuition

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waivers for underprivileged students. in conclusion,
while
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tax
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

payments may have some drawbacks,
i
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I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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strongly argue that the benefits of
this
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statment
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statement

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is
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb is appears to be unnecessary here.

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far outweigh the disadvantages
due to
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the development of nations.

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task achievement
Ensure you clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain this stance throughout the essay. Although you have clearly expressed your opinion, the introduction could be more engaging.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence by ensuring each paragraph smoothly transitions to the next. Avoid sudden jumps in ideas or topics.
task achievement
Provide specific and relevant examples to support your arguments. General statements can be strengthened with real-world examples or statistics.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of ideas, and ensure each point is thoroughly explained and supported. Sometimes, the essay feels repetitive and lacks depth in argumentation.
task achievement
The essay displays a clear understanding of the topic and the importance of taxation.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively restates your opinion and summarizes the main arguments quite well.
supported main points
Your essay includes relevant points about social welfare and infrastructure development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute
  • welfare
  • public services
  • progressive taxation
  • distribution of wealth
  • civic duty
  • social cohesion
  • tax evasion
  • economic disparities
  • social unrest
  • individual rights
  • societal responsibilities
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