Over poulation is a masure problem What causes it? and how to resolve it?
Over
the
time Correct article usage
apply
number
of habitats around the world have
increased drastically which raised the Correct subject-verb agreement
has
voice
of experts who are afraid of Fix the agreement mistake
voices
Correct article usage
the depltion
depltion
of supplies and Correct your spelling
depletion
the
natural resources on the earth.In my humble Correct article usage
apply
opnion
,I think that Correct your spelling
opinion
over population
is a very critical problem,which Correct your spelling
overpopulation
have
Change the verb form
has
sideffects
that can not be easily managed.
Correct your spelling
side-effects
To begin
with,there are a lot of problems concerning the over carrying capacity which includes; traffic congestion,polution
,unemployment and urbanization.Correct your spelling
pollution
In other words
,folks
Change noun form
folks'
folk's
number
increases and affects
all aspects of our daily Correct subject-verb agreement
affect
life
starting with traffic and ending up with Fix the agreement mistake
lives
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
all
resources on earth.Change preposition
of all
For instance
,India is one of the big
cities Correct word choice
biggest
around
the world with enormous Change preposition
in
naturall
resources but Correct your spelling
natural
due to
over capacity
,they cannot meet the basic human needs of every habitat.What can be said is thatCorrect your spelling
overcapacity
,
the overpopulation causes a lot of Remove the comma
apply
damaged
to people Change the form of the verb
damage
as well as
the environment.
However
,there is a global social awarness
to alleviate the issue Correct your spelling
awareness
in
a global scale starting with the developing countries which hold Change preposition
on
the
most of the Correct article usage
apply
responsiblities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
comparing
to developed countries which have taken the hardest step by controlling the birth rate.An eminent example is Germany where the birth rate Wrong verb form
compared
changes
from Replace the word
changed
postive
to negative which means they Correct your spelling
positive
are
no longer have a problem with the increased Unnecessary verb
apply
number of
population.
Correct quantifier usage
apply
To conclude
,After discussing the isuue
,it can be said that Correct your spelling
issue
global
population Correct article usage
the global
number
cause numerous issues to be resolved easily.So it is the duty of individuals and government
to find a solution ,Correct article usage
the government
otherwise
the effect can be catastrophic.Add a comma
otherwise,
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task by discussing both causes and solutions for overpopulation, but there are some areas to improve. Try to elaborate more on the causes and solutions to add depth to your response.
task achievement
Ensure your ideas are clearly and comprehensively expressed. Some sentences are convoluted and could be simplified. For instance, 'India is one of the big cities' should be 'India is one of the largest countries.'
task achievement
Add more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. Using examples applicable to a broader context can strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Your essay follows a logical structure, but it could be clearer. Make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and transitions smoothly to the next. For example, the sentence 'What can be said is that,the overpopulation causes a lot of damaged to people as well as the environment.' could be better placed and connected to the preceding sentence.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each main point is well-supported with evidence or examples. Currently, the main points are mentioned but not thoroughly developed. Expand on each idea with supporting details.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which help guide the reader through your essay.
task achievement
You attempted to provide specific examples, which is good. For instance, discussing India's and Germany's different approaches to population control adds depth to your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.