Some people get a chance to choose between life without work and spending most of the time working, then they would choose not to work. Agree or disagree?

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It is presumed that if any person was questioned about living in a world where one needs to spend most time working or the one that working does not appear, they would choose the latter offer. I firmly contend that the statement is false

due to

Linking Words

how illogical it is and the purpose of working to survive in human life. Admittedly, stress and peer pressure from working are inevitable,

thus

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, thinking about a life without them will make

people

Use synonyms

happier.

However

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, if there were no jobs available

then

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how the services and goods would be made to

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

people

Use synonyms

's essential needs and desires? Despite that, some

people

Use synonyms

argue that robotics can cope with that issue.

This

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is a credible point to some extent but what about engineers who operate them? Without them working

this

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point is meaningless.

Additionally

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, other negative problems would rise rapidly if

people

Use synonyms

stopped creating products

such

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as the dissents between the rich and poor as there is no salary disparity.

Therefore

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, in the end, society would collapse if the situation was true which makes

people

Use synonyms

want to avoid it. Another reason to oppose

this

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statement is the natural

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

of working. Scientifically,

this

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is every animal's instinct when they are born in order to survive.

Hence

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, without commuting to work or gardening in the fields, the human race would not be able to survive.

Moreover

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, cooperation is what most

people

Use synonyms

look for when

applying

Add the preposition

applying for

show examples

a job,

thus

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, helps foster connection between

people

Use synonyms

and create a sense of protection which is vital for life. From my prior experience, when I started a business alone it resulted in a fail but the case was not true when I had my friends to go

along with

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. Ultimately, working to survive is the priority for humans. In conclusion, there is no chance that

people

Use synonyms

will lean toward the dedication of not working

due to

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the given reasons.

Submitted by [email protected] on Mon Jun 03 2024

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task achievement

Your essay presents a clear position on the topic, and you develop your ideas logically. However, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that each point directly supports your main argument.

coherence cohesion

Although the essay is relatively well-organized, it could benefit from clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader. Ensure smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs.

task achievement

Try to elaborate on your main points with more detailed examples and specific evidence. This will strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.

coherence cohesion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.

coherence cohesion

Your main points are logically structured and support your overall argument well. This contributes to a coherent essay.

task achievement

You addressed the prompt and gave a comprehensive response to the question posed.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

317 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

constraints of employment
immerse
personal fulfillment
enhanced relationships
work-related stress
professional achievements
financial insecurity
societal backlash
cultural expectations
identity and worth

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Some people get a chance to choose between life without work and spending most of the time working, then they would choose not to work. Agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You are not satisfied with a product you purchased. Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter: - Describe the product and the problem. - Explain what you want the store to do. - Say what you will do if the issue is not resolved.

In spite of improvement in the healthcare by governments many people in developed countries are suffering from overweight and obesity. What are the causes of this and what other the impacts

“Libraries are irrelevant in the age of the internet and should not be publicly funded.” Do you agree or disagree?

Give detail information about the crimes in the newspaper and on television has the bad consequences.Some suggest that govenment should impose some restrictions.To what extent you agree or disagree.