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Writing Samples
Band 7

In the past, many people got married when they were very young, but today, many people do not get married until later. Why do you think they do this, and is it a good or a bad idea?

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There was a trend in the
last
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 century to be in wedlock from an early age, nowadays it has become the opposite, the marriage starts at a late age.
However
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, I think that the main reason for
this
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 tendency is the
life
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 average.
Although
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,
this
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 is a bad way to make a family without
life
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's experience and financial independence. The first thing we need to understand is that every period has its individual differences connected with the environment.
Second,
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today 40-year-old person is a young guy, 50 years ago he would have been an old one.
Finally
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, medicine wasn't at a low level and it influences lifespan.
For example
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, Natalya Goncharova wife of the great Russian poet A. S. Pushkin described his teacher Mr Karamzin as a very old man, he was only 45
then
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. Meanwhile, the ability to cure a lot of diseases appeared in the 20th century. The previous information confirms my point of view, our ancestors had to get married early to give their children a chance for a better
life
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.
On the other hand
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, problems with medical care and the duration of
life
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 are in the past.
However
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, there are new challenges in the 21st century to deal with. Doubtless, if you want family today you need to have practice and be able to earn enough.
For example
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, the data collected by Social Agency Ltd.shows that the main reasons for divorces in 2020 were money(37%) and inability to find compromise during the relationship(25%). I believe that the young ones need to get some skills in
life
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 and to have good bank accounts before they start living together. In conclusion, I think that the essay's questions have very good and straight answers, they are, on the one hand, the influence terms of
life
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 surrounding in the past makes early ages' families.
On the other hand
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, we do not need to act the same way today.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all ideas are fully expanded and explained.
task achievement
Be sure to address both parts of the prompt comprehensively: why people marry later and whether it's a good or bad idea.
task achievement
While examples are relevant, they can be more specific and varied to strengthen the arguments.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
There are several relevant points made to explain why people get married later in life.
task achievement
Examples given, while sometimes generalized, support the main points effectively.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • negative health effects
  • personal freedom
  • illegal trade
  • smuggling
  • regulate
  • designated
  • non-smokers
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