Some people believe that they should maintain all of the money they earn and should not pay taxes. Do you agree or disagree?

It is believed by some that they should keep all of their income rather than pay
taxes
. The writer,
however
, totally disagrees with
this
statement
due to
maintaining public amenities and boosting social welfare as education. It is crucial to acknowledge how important
taxes
are.
That is
to say, authorities provide citizens with numerous demands
such
as accommodations or employment that people necessitate to maintain an adequate.
This
assistance comes from the
taxes
which are collected from some percentage of one’s income.
As a consequence
, provided that citizens do not pay
taxes
, it will act as a deterrence for maintaining public facilities
as
Correct quantifier usage
such as
show examples
hospitals or schools,
thus
governments are unable to repair and update
this
infrastructure, which will affect the lives of individuals in case of broken facilities as they cannot utilize those. Another point that should be taken into consideration is the improvement of the welfare state, especially in education. To be more specific, governments usually utilize
taxes
to subsidize education
such
as free charge of school
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
since they are tools to solidify important knowledge
such
as literacy and numeracy that are needed for their job prospects.
Consequently
, should people accept to pay
taxes
, authorities will have more money to build new schools
as well as
improve school facilities,
thus
more people can get access to study to ensure gaining a job and earning money.
To conclude
, paying
taxes
should be a usual responsibility for dwellers owning to amenities maintaining and enhancing educational opportunities.
Hence
, the essay should have shown that it is essential for everyone to pay
taxes
.
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the task by presenting a clear standpoint and supporting arguments. However, there are opportunities to further elaborate on your ideas and provide more specific examples to strengthen your points.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion. To enhance coherence, consider using more linking words and phrases to ensure smooth transitions between ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are complex and could benefit from simplification for greater clarity. Aim for variety in sentence structure while maintaining readability.
task achievement
You have provided a clear opinion and supported it with relevant arguments, addressing both public amenities and education.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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