As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Overall
, I agree with the statement that the internet
is dominating the world, and because of its convenience and accessibility people
prefer the internet
to watch the news
instead
of newspapers
these days.
To begin
with, technology has become an indispensable part of life, and the internet
is one of the marvelous
inventions of technology. In the past times Change the spelling
marvellous
due to
lack
of technological advancements Correct article usage
a lack
people
used to read the news
from disctinct
Correct your spelling
distinct
newspapers
, and newspaper
was the only source through which they could stay connected with the world. Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
On the other hand
, in modern
world, the Add an article
the modern
internet
is the most preferable medium for latest
updates, first of all, everyone has Correct article usage
the latest
internet
connection on their mobile phones which makes it a Correct article usage
an internet
convenience
source. Replace the word
convenient
Besides
this
, people
can watch the news
any time they want as they no longer have to wait for the delievery
of the newspaper Correct your spelling
delivery
everyday
, Replace the word
every day
for example
, they can turn on the web and can watch the news
even while
travelling.
Apart from that, getting the
Correct article usage
an
internet
connection is quite cheap as compared to newspapers
. People
only have to pay a couple of dollars each month, and sometimes, for instance
, many companies have promotional offers as well which makes it even more affordable. Also
the Add a comma
Also,
internet
can covers
Change the verb form
cover
vast
variety of Add an article
a vast
the
Correct article usage
apply
news
of
its own nation and Change preposition
from
also
from different nations, while
a newspaper has only a few pages which cannot do that much coverage. Moreover
, on the internet
there are distinct apps like Facebook, YouTube, and many more where people
can see visuals and other videos related to the news
; however
, this
feature is not possible in newspapers
.
In conclusion, there are so many features that the internet
has like convenience, accessibility, visuals and videos, vast
coverage, which makes it a quite popular source for watching the Correct word choice
and vast
news
; however
, these charactersitics
are not available in Correct your spelling
characteristics
newspapers
.Submitted by harleenarora620 on
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task achievement
Your response thoroughly addresses the task by discussing both the rise of the internet and its impact on newspapers. However, try to balance your arguments more evenly. Spend some time discussing any remaining advantages of newspapers to show a more balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
Your essay presents clear ideas and flows logically from one point to another. To improve further, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that ties back to the main point of that paragraph.
task achievement
While your main points are supported well, incorporating more relevant and specific examples can strengthen your argument. Providing data, statistics, or a brief anecdote can make your essay even more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are strong, but consider making your conclusion slightly longer to summarize your points more comprehensively. This can give a more polished ending to your essay.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task effectively and provides a clear stance on the issue.
coherence cohesion
The ideas presented are clear and easy to follow, making it straightforward for the reader to understand your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are well-supported with explanations, which adds depth to your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction and conclusion that frame your argument well.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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