The best way to solve the world's environmental problem is to increase the price of fuels. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Increasing
the
Correct article usage
apply
fuel
costs is one of the suitable solutions to tackle Use synonyms
the
global environmental issues. I strongly agree with Correct article usage
apply
this
statement because it will decrease a great Linking Words
number
of environmental contaminations.
On the one hand, I assume that the Use synonyms
price
of Use synonyms
fuel
has Use synonyms
direct
influence on people’s consumption. Add an article
a direct
To begin
with, nowadays, our world faces severe economic crises. Linking Words
Due to
Linking Words
this
phenomenon, the fees become important to people from rich to poor, and if they had to pay a huge sum of money Linking Words
on
Change preposition
for
the
petrol for their private vehicles, they would prefer to use public Correct article usage
apply
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
instead
. The Linking Words
number
of personal Use synonyms
cars
which are used by individuals decrease significantly, Use synonyms
this
means that the air quality would increase. Linking Words
Besides
, the vast amount of Linking Words
fuel
is used by the import and export companies in order to ship Use synonyms
the
unnecessary objects. By Correct article usage
apply
rising
the petrol fee the shipping would be limited to vital goods, and it has Correct your spelling
raising
direct
impact on the Add an article
a direct
number
of cargo Use synonyms
ship
. Fix the agreement mistake
ships
As a result
, less contamination will be added to the ocean, and the sea environmental problems might be solved in the future.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, I think, if the Linking Words
price
of Use synonyms
fuel
becomes expensive, Use synonyms
the
individuals might come up with some ideas. Correct article usage
apply
The scientists
and inventors try to invent Correct article usage
Scientists
low
consume vehicles or promote Correct word choice
apply
electrical
Replace the word
electric
cars
. People are Use synonyms
couraged
to purchase these vehicles which use alternative energy, so they can manage their running expenses Verb problem
encouraged
instead
of paying for Linking Words
fuel
. Use synonyms
This
trend would decline the Linking Words
number
of petrol-use Use synonyms
cars
noticeably and the next generations may not consume any Use synonyms
fuel
for their Use synonyms
cars
. Use synonyms
Moreover
, Linking Words
usage
of renewable energies will become more Correct article usage
the usage
usual
, and people prefer to use them at Correct word choice
common
the
reasonable Correct article usage
a
price
. The countries that have Use synonyms
potential
for generating alternative energy start to produce their efficient power. The power plants will be made to produce power by using solar panels or wind turbines which have no harm to our planet.
In conclusion, I believe that changing the Add an article
the potential
fuel
Use synonyms
price
to an unaffordable Use synonyms
price
would have Use synonyms
positive
impact on controlling Add an article
a positive
the
environmental problems.Correct article usage
apply
Submitted by Negar_seddigh on
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coherence cohesion
While the essay effectively communicates its main points, structuring your arguments into clear and distinct paragraphs would improve readability and coherence. You could consider using topic sentences to clearly indicate what each paragraph will discuss.
task achievement
You have provided a comprehensive response to the task and have mentioned relevant ideas and examples. However, you could strengthen your arguments further by providing more concrete examples and statistical data to support your claims.
coherence cohesion
There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrasings in the essay. Proofreading your essay or using grammar-check tools can help you identify and correct these errors.
task achievement
You have clearly stated your position and effectively supported it with various arguments and examples. This demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and strong task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical flow and your arguments are generally coherent, making it easy for the reader to follow your main points. Including a conclusion that succinctly summarizes your arguments is also a plus.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example