Nowadays a few people take their family with them abroad whenever they go on a business trip. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are
trend
Add an article
a trend
show examples
which is
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
for join family doing meet go to foreign. I believe
that
Linking Words
is
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
develop
Wrong verb form
develops
show examples
a negative and organisation must careful in that situation.
This
Linking Words
essai
Correct your spelling
essay
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
decribe
Correct your spelling
describe
how to household help in get
balance
Correct article usage
a balance
show examples
among
Change preposition
between
show examples
work and
life
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as anyway mistake a
infomation
Correct your spelling
information
include
relevan
Correct your spelling
relevant
example
Fix the agreement mistake
examples
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
appreciate
point
Add an article
the point
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. There are many testimonials which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
about family having benefit in business trip.
Main
Add an article
The main
show examples
reason is that the employees
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
keep
Change the verb form
keeping
show examples
Add an article
a work
show examples
work
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
life
Use synonyms
balance
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. The company
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
leave
Change the verb form
leaves
show examples
extremely
Change the word
extreme
show examples
time small of
individual
Add an article
the individual
an individual
show examples
for employee,
this
Linking Words
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
condition must become
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
opportunity research career in foreign.
For example
Linking Words
, gelael owner
kfc
Correct your spelling
KFC
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
business
Correct article usage
a business
show examples
popular in the world because they
are always keep
Change the verb form
always keep
show examples
receipt of food and give
low
Add an article
a low
show examples
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
per menu.
In addition
Linking Words
, I hope that currently several people go to foreign to get new
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
or
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
to make new
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
and that can increase knowledge or new education. In Conclusion, many people
prefer
Add the particle
prefer to
show examples
choose
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
high wages because, in
reall
Correct your spelling
real
life
Use synonyms
every year need
life
Use synonyms
always
go
Correct subject-verb agreement
goes
show examples
up and the government
less
Add a missing verb
has less
show examples
give
Verb problem
apply
show examples
appreciate
Replace the word
appreciation
show examples
to society about education
how
Correct word choice
and how
show examples
to increase earnings in
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by patricius.yohanes on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay needs a clearer structure with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. It's important to effectively organize your ideas to enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your introduction clearly presents the topic and your position. The conclusion should summarize your arguments and restate your opinion.
task achievement
Include specific and relevant examples that directly support your arguments. For instance, mention studies or statistics relating to work-life balance and family involvement in business trips.
task achievement
Clarify your main points and elaborate on them to make your arguments more comprehensive. Try to avoid vague statements and ensure your ideas are logically connected.
task achievement
You have attempted to address the task and provided an opinion on the topic.
task achievement
You have made an effort to discuss multiple aspects of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: