The tendency that news reports in media focus on problems and emergencies rather than on positive developments in harmful for individuals and the society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In an ever-progressive society, the priority of some topics in
news
reports
is a debatable discussion point. I believe that it is more important to focus on reports
which
related to Correct pronoun usage
apply
emergencies
and problems
in the community
, despite those who believe that it will have a negative impact on each person and community
if people
give less prior to positive changes
Change the noun form
change
reports
.
It must be self-evident that news
which observes emergencies
is vital because it can decide the life or death of numerous people
. For example
, in Japan where earthquakes usually happen, the notices of disasters on news
reports
before it is occur may give people
more time to find safe places. As a result
, citizens' lives can be preserved.
Moreover
, the problems
in society are provided by reports
help
Correct pronoun usage
that help
people
to acknowledge the seriousness of problems
and increase citizens' awareness. That will alleviate their bad behaviours which directly affect living environments then
the quality of life may improve. For insurance, global warming is becoming significant, by showing it on the news
people
from all over the world can recognize the seriousness of problems
and promptly reduce negative impacts such
as using plastic, wasting food or traffic congestion.
As opposed to the argument for the benefits of news
reports
related to emergencies
and social problems
, I believe that too small presence of positive news
reports
can cause anxiety for citizens. This
is because residents always have to live under fear and vigilance due to
the scare of becoming a victim of those problems
. Take the Japanese as an example, they always have to live with the fear of earthquakes that could happen at any time after watching too much notice about a
number of deaths by earthquakes.
Correct article usage
the
To sum up
, reports
about problems
and emergencies
help people
stay safe and increase community
awareness but there are too many articles like that causing fear in the community
. However
, multimedia communication channels should balance between those kind of reports
Submitted by [email protected]
on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task, but some points can be elaborated further to enhance clarity and depth. Consider expanding on your arguments related to the benefits of positive news to make your essay more balanced and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Be mindful of grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that can obscure your ideas. For example, 'before it is occur' should be 'before it occurs.' Keep sentences clear and error-free.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences. This improves readability and the logical flow of your ideas. Additionally, finding smoother transitions between points will help improve the cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This is essential for coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
You have used relevant examples to support your arguments, which enhances the credibility of your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.