In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very importatnt for people. Why misht this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

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Home ownership
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Homeownership
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is more valuable to people in some countries
instead
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of renting it.
This
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is
due to
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the fact that it provides financial stability and
hassle free
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hassle-free
show examples
life to them. I firmly believe
,
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apply
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this
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is beneficial to an individual, despite the fact that there are some
inconviniences
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inconveniences
to owning a
house
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. Renting a
house
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can be a financial burden sometimes. In numerous countries, the
rent
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of a home can be very high. A significant portion of income usually goes to housing.
However
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, if someone
buy
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buys
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that very same
house
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on
mortgage
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a mortgage
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, the monthly payment can be in
Correct article usage
the simillar
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simillar
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similar
range
of
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to
show examples
the
rent
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, if not less.
For instance
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, in Florida, the average mortgage
of
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apply
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is 3% lower than
rent
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for a decent
middle class
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middle-class
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house
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.
This
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way money can be allocated in ways to improve the living standard
as well as
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build an asset. Buying a
house
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can be a very important step for the
well being
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well-being
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of a family. A
house
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is basically an asset that can be valued
upto
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up
in
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to
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millions. In an emergency or
incase
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in case
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of purchasing another property, it can be sold
in
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at
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good
Correct article usage
a good
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price.
For example
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, it is a common practice in America to buy an apartment at an early age, which is
then
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sold to move into a big
house
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when they form a family. Another way home ownership can be rewarding is in time of retirement. When a person
retire
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retires
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, it is very difficult to keep
providing
Verb problem
paying
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rent
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. It can risk
loosing
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losing
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a place to stay.
In a
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A
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study by
Herverd
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Harvard
University
it
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apply
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says, 9% of
retiere
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retirees
become homeless and live on the street.
To conclude
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, ownership of a place to live is extremely important, as it provides financial security. I believe it is better than renting a
house
Use synonyms
, as it builds up wealth
as well as
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allows a
peacefull
Correct your spelling
peaceful
mind.
Submitted by mostakahmedfaysal on

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grammar vocabulary
Work on spelling and minor grammatical errors to improve clarity. For example, 'important' instead of 'importatnt', and 'inconveniences' instead of 'inconviniences'.
coherence
Enhance the coherence by ensuring smoother transitions between paragraphs and ideas. Use linking words and phrases more effectively.
introduction conclusion
Include a more explicit and stronger thesis statement in the introduction to better outline your position.
task response
Provide more varied and detailed examples to support your main points. This will help in presenting a more compelling argument.
task response
The essay presents a clear position on the topic, supporting the benefits of home ownership over renting.
task response
Good use of specific examples, such as referencing mortgage rates in Florida and practices in America.
coherence
Logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural Significance
  • Financial Investment
  • Heritage and Legacy
  • Equity
  • Return
  • Security
  • Permanence
  • Customize
  • Stability
  • Financial Burden
  • Socioeconomic Disparities
  • Marginalized
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