In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very importatnt for people. Why misht this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Home ownership
Correct your spelling
Homeownership
show examples
is more valuable to people in some countries
instead
of renting it.
This
is
due to
the fact that it provides financial stability and
hassle free
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hassle-free
show examples
life to them. I firmly believe
,
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apply
show examples
this
is beneficial to an individual, despite the fact that there are some
inconviniences
Correct your spelling
inconveniences
to owning a
house
. Renting a
house
can be a financial burden sometimes. In numerous countries, the
rent
of a home can be very high. A significant portion of income usually goes to housing.
However
, if someone
buy
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buys
show examples
that very same
house
on
mortgage
Correct article usage
a mortgage
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, the monthly payment can be in
Correct article usage
the simillar
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simillar
Correct your spelling
similar
range
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
rent
, if not less.
For instance
, in Florida, the average mortgage
of
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apply
show examples
is 3% lower than
rent
for a decent
middle class
Add a hyphen
middle-class
show examples
house
.
This
way money can be allocated in ways to improve the living standard
as well as
build an asset. Buying a
house
can be a very important step for the
well being
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well-being
show examples
of a family. A
house
is basically an asset that can be valued
upto
Correct your spelling
up
in
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to
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millions. In an emergency or
incase
Correct your spelling
in case
show examples
of purchasing another property, it can be sold
in
Change preposition
at
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good
Correct article usage
a good
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price.
For example
, it is a common practice in America to buy an apartment at an early age, which is
then
sold to move into a big
house
when they form a family. Another way home ownership can be rewarding is in time of retirement. When a person
retire
Change the verb form
retires
show examples
, it is very difficult to keep
providing
Verb problem
paying
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rent
. It can risk
loosing
Replace the word
losing
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a place to stay.
In a
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A
show examples
study by
Herverd
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Harvard
University
it
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apply
show examples
says, 9% of
retiere
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retirees
become homeless and live on the street.
To conclude
, ownership of a place to live is extremely important, as it provides financial security. I believe it is better than renting a
house
, as it builds up wealth
as well as
allows a
peacefull
Correct your spelling
peaceful
mind.
Submitted by mostakahmedfaysal on

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grammar vocabulary
Work on spelling and minor grammatical errors to improve clarity. For example, 'important' instead of 'importatnt', and 'inconveniences' instead of 'inconviniences'.
coherence
Enhance the coherence by ensuring smoother transitions between paragraphs and ideas. Use linking words and phrases more effectively.
introduction conclusion
Include a more explicit and stronger thesis statement in the introduction to better outline your position.
task response
Provide more varied and detailed examples to support your main points. This will help in presenting a more compelling argument.
task response
The essay presents a clear position on the topic, supporting the benefits of home ownership over renting.
task response
Good use of specific examples, such as referencing mortgage rates in Florida and practices in America.
coherence
Logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural Significance
  • Financial Investment
  • Heritage and Legacy
  • Equity
  • Return
  • Security
  • Permanence
  • Customize
  • Stability
  • Financial Burden
  • Socioeconomic Disparities
  • Marginalized
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