Some people think governments should spend less money on arts and invest more in education. How far do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Art
and Education
have a different output for Government
. By Giving a focus on Correct article usage
the Government
art
, it can help the government
to get more investors, increasing revenue from the visitors, and also
it will be a potential place for tourists to come. Meanwhile, Education
is one of the important things for the government
to provide a good quality human resource in the future.
In my opinion, I prefer the government
to invest more in the arts rather than spend more money on education
.
Firstly
, some researchers said people
who work in art
, they are using a right-side brain to work. A right-side brain means creativity. They know the limitations to keeping creative and surviving to produce beautiful art
.
Secondly
, art
is a place for people
to express their emotions,
and feelings, and it will be a beautiful creation. Those who know arts can appreciate that creation at an expensive price. More support in arts can give a chance every Remove the comma
apply
people
to explore the beauty inside of art
and automatically it will have an impact
on the region and attract people
to come and visit their region.
For example
, investing more in art
is providing a media, museum, or instructor for every person who has the potential talent to produce their creation in art
, show it to the public and actually it will give added value to the government
.
In conclusion, spending money on art
will have an impact
directly on the government
. For their people
, revenue, and tourism. Even though education
is important for people
, it does not have a direct impact
but it will have an impact
in the future.Submitted by jermias.darondo89 on
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task response
Your essay provides a clear stance on the issue, but it lacks sufficient depth in its arguments. Ensure that you develop your points more thoroughly, with relevant examples to enhance your argumentation.
task response
A more balanced approach can help to present a well-rounded argument. Although supporting art is important, acknowledging and providing a counter-argument for education might strengthen your response.
coherence cohesion
While the essay has a logical structure, it can be improved by having smoother transitions between paragraphs. Signposting words or phrases can help guide the reader more effectively through your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph distinctly supports a key point of your argument. Ensure that your main points are clearly supported with appropriate evidence and examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, making it easy to follow the writer's main argument.
task response
The writer's viewpoint is clear and consistent throughout the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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