You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #technology #people #viewpoints

It is

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

thought by a selection of people that state-of-the-art

technology

has enabled individuals to group up together

while

others believe it only pushes them apart. In

this

essay, both viewpoints will be discussed before reaching my conclusion which is I agree with the former. At the outset, it is true that modern

technology

can bring citizens together and one of the most significant support is that it strengthens bonds and relationships. To elaborate

further

technology

such

as smartphones can help us get together just by calling and keeping individuals in touch with their loved ones.

Moreover

, citizens who cannot join at that time can still join via video call from their PCs or mobile phones. An apt illustration is that my friend always makes group calls via Skype because there are some of us who are now studying abroad.

Besides

, when have free time and go out together, he will use Skype to call others to join the meals and have fun-filled conversations. On the flip side, there are several reasons why

technology

has driven us apart and the most crucial one is that it changes our ways of thinking. To explain in greater detail, some people will think that they do not have to attend any events and just wait to use spanking new programmes to join.

Furthermore

, they just look at videos later if those events or meetings are recorded which leads to being more solitary and introverted. To specifically demonstrate, my boss,

who

Change the pronoun

whom

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I am now working with, always decides to use Microsoft Team software to attend meetings because he feels lazy and unenthusiastic

to join

Change preposition

about joining

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Change preposition

apply

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Change preposition

apply

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the construction site.

In addition

, if he finds out that the meeting is not related to our responsibilities, he will decline to join the programme and watch recorded videos later. All in all,

due to

the advancement of

technology

, it depends on people's

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

show examples

how

Change preposition

on how

show examples

they will utilise those modern devices or programmes.

However

, from my point of view, these things benefit us a lot because they enhance and improve our relationships with others.

Submitted by nnatthinee on Thu Jun 06 2024

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Vocabulary

Introduce more varied vocabulary to avoid repetition and enhance the reader’s engagement. While the essay is clear, using a broader range of synonyms and expressions will add sophistication to the writing.

Argumentation

Consider giving a balanced representation of both viewpoints, ensuring not to overly favor one side until your personal opinion is expressed. This will add more depth to the discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion

Provide a final summarizing sentence in each body paragraph to clearly wrap up the arguments before moving on to the next point. This will make your arguments more cohesive.

Task Response

Ensure that each example is directly tied to the main argument of the paragraph and that its relevance is explicitly clarified to strengthen the task response.

Structure

Clear structure with a distinct introduction, body paragraphs discussing both viewpoints, and a conclusion that reflects your opinion, which is effective for clarity.

Examples

The examples provided are pertinent and help in illustrating the points being made. They add a personal touch to the essay which helps in engaging the reader.

Argumentation

The essay presents a balanced discussion of both viewpoints and successfully explains why you favor one over the other towards the end.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

345 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5

7.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

7.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

7.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Fostering
Global connections
Isolation
Diminished
Face-to-face interactions
Cultural and geographical divides
Paradox
Social media
Alienating
Family dynamics
Echo chambers
Polarize
Marginalized communities
Inclusivity
Maintaining relationships
Evolution of communication
Instant messaging
Video calls
Technological advances
Collaboration
Remote isolation

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Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Today, some food travels thousands of miles from farms to consumers. Some people think that it would be better to our environment and economy if people only eat locally produced food. To what extent do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?

a person's worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social and material possessions. old- fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion

Some people think that the amount of money spent on library is a waste as a new technologies are developing and replacing library functions. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to dealt with the public Why is this happening? Do u think this is an appropriate use of government?