In many countries today, the retirement age from work has been raised. Do the advantages of raising the retirement age outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, many countries have implemented policies towards the rise in the retirement
age
to develop the economy
, and this
causes disputes about its benefits and drawbacks. Therefore
, this
essay will point out some arguments about why this
method has more negative impacts.
It is undeniable that lengthening the working age
can positively impact a country's economy
and society. Firstly
, by working longer, elderly workers can have the financial security to expense personal purposes, mitigating a burden on pension funds. Therefore
, the government can leverage these abundant financial resources to grow the economy
by investing in crucial sectors, such
as education, medical services, and domestic infrastructure. Secondly
, young employees will have the chance to be instructed by older colleagues who have accumulated extensive experience and valuable expertise over the working years, leading to generating highly skilled workers. This
can contribute to the country's rise in work performance.
Although
raising the retirement age
can offer the aforementioned positive effects, I still contend that this
phenomenon can risk human health issues and negatively impact the labour market. For elderly employees, their body functions will be impaired when they are aged, decreasing their performance. Their mental and physical health can be affected if they continue working in high-pressure environments like banking companies or law organizations. Consequently
, they can be susceptible to severe illnesses like heart attacks, stress, and sleep disorders. Additionally
, finding jobs can be challenging for recently graduated students because they must compete against their peers and the elderly workforce who continue working, increasing the unemployment rate. More importantly, this
can cause a process of moving to other countries to work by high-skilled people, which is detrimental to a country's economic growth.
In conclusion, the policy of raising the retirement age
can develop the economy
and sharpen young workers' skill levels. Nonetheless
, it still has damaging effects on humans and society, adding more stress and exacerbating the unemployment situation. Hence
, the government can boost the economy
and enhance resident well-being by welcoming skilled immigrants and reducing working hours.Submitted by Mads on
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relevant specific examples
Provide more specific examples to strengthen the points, such as statistics or case studies, to make arguments more convincing.
logical structure
While the essay maintains a clear logical progression, slightly more transitions could enhance flow in some parts.
introduction conclusion present
A well-structured introduction and conclusion are presented, clearly outlining the topic and providing a summarizing view.
complete response
The response effectively covers both advantages and disadvantages of raising the retirement age, showing a balanced view.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...
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