IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

write a letter to the editor of the magazine about the book that influenced you most. In your letter describe what this book was about explain how this book influenced you say whether this book would be likely to influence other people

#editor #magazine #book #influence #people
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing with regard to the article called "the book that influenced me most" that you wanted to include contributions from readers in
5th
Correct article usage
the 5th
show examples
 issue of your magazine. The most impressive book that I read was "The Green House" which was about a group of
animals
 which live on a farm.
This
 book helps me to be familiar with living in a group and its advantages and disadvantages. To explain more,
This
 story was about different
animals
 who live on the farm. The farmer used to kill one of the
animals
 on a regular basis. Each of them thought which was better than the others and it was not killed at all.
Therefore
, there were not any movements in that society against landlords.
Finally
, all of the
animals
 were killed by the farmer. In my idea, it would be likely to influence other audiences of your magazine. Owing to encouraging people to do teamwork activities and being supportive, I would be very impressed. I look forward to receiving a response based on my ideas. Yours faithfully, Mahshid Ka
Submitted by kargar.mh1992 on

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task achievement
Ensure that each idea is elaborated adequately to strengthen your argument. For instance, you might explain more about the theme of teamwork in the book.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical transitions between paragraphs for smoother readability. This can be done by using more transitional phrases and linking words.
task achievement
The letter clearly addresses the topic and responds to each part of the prompt.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is appropriate for a formal letter to an editor.
coherence cohesion
The letter is structured logically with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are correctly formatted and appropriate for a formal letter.
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