IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#companies #salaries #ceos #executives #workers
Factories should pay higher
payment
Fix the agreement mistake
payments
show examples
 to CEOs and executives than other employees.
This
 writer
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
 with that point
due to
 these managers deserve
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their effort and will explain more clearly in the below essay
To begin
 with, CEOs and executives or any other managing
position
 may have to make
such
 an effort to reach that rank.
Therefore
, higher income would give them encouragement and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
let them know that
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
their determination and
attempt
Fix the agreement mistake
attempts
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 always
worthy
Replace the word
worth
show examples
.
For instance
,
trying
Add the particle
trying to
show examples
 work hard to become a manager
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 receive
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
show examples
put
Wrong verb form
puts
show examples
 those people
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 a
full of motivation
Replace the word
fully motivated
show examples
 situation.
As a result
, attracting higher quality
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
hard-working employees is a substantial benefit Another point to consider is that gaining the company reputation regarding to high quality of managing
position
, an enterprise which
pay
Change the verb form
pays
show examples
 high income for CEOs and supervisors will have a good reputation among workers.
As a result
,
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
 the total earnings or the produced quantity of their product of the whole company is
also
 a considerable advantage In conclusion, every
position
 in
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
deserve
Change the verb form
deserves
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 own effort. So, greater revenue
giving
Wrong verb form
given
show examples
 to those managing
position
Fix the agreement mistake
positions
show examples
 like executives and
CEO s
Correct your spelling
CEOs
 is not a waste
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence & cohesion
1. Improve sentence structure and coherence by connecting ideas with appropriate conjunctions and phrases. 2. Provide more specific examples to substantiate your points effectively. 3. Enhance the clarity of your introduction and conclusion by refining the language and structure.
task achievement
1. Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and specific examples. This will make your argument stronger. 2. Address potential counterarguments to show a balanced view and deepen your discussion. 3. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea and avoids repetition.
content
1. The essay provides a clear stance on the topic that is consistently supported throughout the text. 2. It is structured logically with distinct paragraphs addressing different points.
structure
1. The writing demonstrates an understanding of the topic and presents relevant points. 2. There is a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the essay well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • executive compensation
  • income disparity
  • corporate governance
  • incentive structures
  • ethical considerations
  • competitive advantage
  • demotivation
  • pay structures
  • social inequality
  • talent acquisition
  • company culture
  • economic impact
  • leadership roles
  • employee morale
What to do next:
Look at other essays: