Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family, we just watch television. To what extent for you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Nowadays, it is argued that
television
provide
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provides
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benefits to society.
However
, some people think that it is destructive to
families
and communities rather than being involved more with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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family gatherings, activities and social festivities, they watch
television
. I strongly agree with the latter opinion.
This
forthcoming essay will discuss both
point
Change to a plural noun
points
show examples
of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
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. On the one hand, there is a growing consensus on the impact
the
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apply
show examples
television
has made in our communities.
In other words
,
television
has been affecting our daily lives in many ways.
Firstly
, it offers a variety of shows that train the viewers to believe certain thoughts.
Secondly
, it changes the
language
we use.
For instance
, it could change the
language
we use with our
families
, despite having a respectable upbringing and constructive rules in
home
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the home
show examples
,
television
can expose
to
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us to
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improper
language
.
For instance
, a child could start using words that should be exclusively used by adults.
On the other hand
, some people believe that
television
shows are beneficial to
families
as they can bring the family together.
For example
, common interests in a household members
,
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apply
show examples
may bring the family together.
In other words
, some shows can bring the family closer.
For instance
, if all siblings are interested in sports they could watch a match together.
Hence
, there will be an opportunity for the family to discuss their thoughts and feelings.
Thus
, it will enhance their relationship. In conclusion, everything has advantages and disadvantages.
Nevertheless
, caution is advised when choosing what to watch in order to make sure improper
language
is avoided. As
overuse
Correct article usage
the overuse
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of
television
can become a source of detachment in
families
, it is important to find
a
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apply
show examples
common ground in the form of shared interests to strengthen the bond in the household.
Submitted by alamer_ma on

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coherence
Work on the logical structure of your paragraphs. each paragraph should discuss one main idea and that idea should be supported with clear evidence.
task achievement
Make sure to provide more relevant and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive.
task achievement
Some of the ideas in your essay are not clearly explained or supported. Ensure that each point you make is fully developed and supported with relevant details.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction presents the topic clearly and introduces both points of view effectively.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay and provides a clear stance.

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  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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