Some people claim that what people eat in many Western countries is unhealthy and that their diet is getting worse .Critics say that these countries should change their diet. What are your opinion on this?

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According to

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the recent scientists' argument, there is an increased demand for ultra-processed products among citizens of Western countries, which

as a consequence

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results in a number of health concerns.

This

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essay will endeavour to discuss the main features of the current issue and

then

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I will represent my personal viewpoint. To commence, the up-to-date food industry provides society with a plethora of food products for people's consumption.

However

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, it is essential to comprehend whether all of these products are valuable for humanity or not. Specifically, the consumption of ultra-processed foods in Western countries has significantly increased over the past few decades. The study conducted at the University of Warwick states that the ratio of heart diseases and type 2 diabetes among UK citizens has increased two-fold in the

last

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ten years.

Hence

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, it definitely justifies that these types of foods could be responsible for detrimental health effects.

Secondly

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, the main point is to analyse which kind of measures should be undertaken by the Western countries’ authorities in order to prevent the negative circumstances of the above-mentioned phenomenon.

Firstly

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, it is essential for individuals to be focused on eating healthy food and adhere a proper lifestyle. Namely,

this

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means eating a balanced diet, getting regular exercise, and providing the body with the requisite vitamins, minerals, fat, water and other nutritious supplements.

Secondly

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, the governments of Western countries ought to organise preventive care services and ensure competitive state hospitals with sufficient medical systems.

To conclude

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, as far as I am concerned, the above-mentioned issue may result in crucial outcomings and concerns to the whole society, and

as a consequence

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has to be solved as soon as possible.

akhmedova.mbSun Jun 09 2024

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relevant specific examples

Your essay should include more specific examples and detailed evidence to strengthen your argument. Consider providing data or real-life examples to support your points more robustly.

clear comprehensive ideas

While your introduction sets the stage effectively, ensure each body paragraph clearly supports your thesis. For instance, link back each point to the main argument about the unhealthy diet in Western countries.

logical structure

Consider breaking down complex ideas into simpler, more concise sentences. Avoid overly long and complicated structures to enhance clarity and readability.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction is strong, and it provides a clear background for the topic, as well as a roadmap for the essay.

complete response

You address the prompt effectively by discussing both the issue and potential solutions, covering the necessary aspects of the task.

logical structure

The essay demonstrates an adequate logical flow from one point to the next, making it fairly easy to follow your arguments.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

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ome people think that individuals today are more dependent on each other. Others believe people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Your friend wants to visit your town. Write a letter to him giving information about the town. In your letter include : 1. what is the good time for visit? 2. describe some interesting places to visit 3. what accomodation is better for his stay?

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