Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some would say that
parents
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should teach their offspring how to be good
members
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of
society
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,
while
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others are of the opinion that
school
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is the best in
this
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regard.
This
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essay agrees with the latter point and will show that, despite the practical
experiences
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that
parents
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give their
children
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,
school
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lessons
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can give deep insights into what it takes to be good citizens. Some believe that
parents
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can educate their
children
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about being good
members
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of
society
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based on their life
experiences
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.
This
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is because the life
experiences
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that
parents
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can give their
children
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are straightforward, down-to-earth, and so they can easily apply what their
parents
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teach them in reality.
For example
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, many
children
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in Thailand become more polite, honest, and caring to everyone as a direct result of the practical
lessons
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that their
parents
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give them at home.
However
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, I believe that
parents
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now are so busy and do not spend much time with their
children
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teaching them.
Lessons
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at
school
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can provide
children
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with valuable insights into being good
members
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of
society
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. In class, students can receive
lessons
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about
different
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the different
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traits of a truly good person that
society
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needs, and
then
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they put what they learn into practice by creating real-life problems and solving them together.
For instance
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, after receiving
lessons
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in civic education at
school
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, many Vietnamese students are more willing to help their
neighbors
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neighbours
show examples
and even strangers, and they feel extremely happy after doing something good for others.
For
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this
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reason, I believe that
school
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lessons
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are more influential to young
children
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. In conclusion, despite the practical
experiences
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that
parents
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can give their
children
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at home,
this
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essay believes that
school
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lessons
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can help students deepen their understanding of being good
members
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of
society
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.
Submitted by wayu.chanpana on

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task achievement
The essay could benefit from a slightly more detailed exploration of how school lessons provide insights into becoming good members of society. You might consider adding more specific examples or elaborating on the role of different subjects or programs within schools.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear topic sentence that succinctly introduces the main idea. This will further improve the clarity and focus of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is clear and sets up both viewpoints effectively. It also clearly states the writer’s position, which guides the reader through the essay.
task achievement
The paragraphs are well-organized and each main point is well-developed with relevant examples, such as the civic education example in Vietnam.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
What to do next:
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