IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

some people think that it will be one of the best ways to solve the environment problems to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some individuals presume that the best solution for environmental issues is that governments should raise the price of fuel for
vehicles
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, especially cars.
This
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 writer totally agrees with
this
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 statement because there is a fact that the majority of pollutants in the atmosphere come from the fumes emitted by
vehicles
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 and residents may change to use electric
transport
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 which is more environmentally friendly
instead
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. There is no doubt that one of the main reasons which causes pollution is the amount of exhaust gases from
vehicles
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.
In other words
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, the higher
costs
Correct article usage
the costs
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 of ammunition for
transport
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, the fewer residents choose to use traditional transportation.
As a consequence
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, it possibly reduces dramatically the harmful gases
as well as
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 enhances the air quality.
For instance
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, the Vietnamese government tend to increase the tax for gases and other similar materials in order to limit the chance of utilizing them by the citizens
due to
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 the fact that Vietnam is one of the most polluted nations all over the world. Another point for consideration is that
this
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 method is able to encourage people to change their habits from using private
vehicles
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 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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public
transport
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 or electric ones. To be more specific, global authorities tend to invest more in the development of buses, trams or electric cars in order to offer more opportunities for residents to use these means of
transport
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instead
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 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel ones.
Hence
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, it will help with cutting down the amount of emissions, particularly carbon dioxide. In conclusion,
due to
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 the severe problems with the environment, authorities need to increase the price of fuel for
transport
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.
This
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 obviously restricts the number of private
vehicles
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 on roads and
also
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 the proportion of CO2 released into the atmosphere.

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coherence cohesion
The essay effectively introduces the main idea and provides a clear conclusion, which contributes to the overall coherence and cohesion. However, it would be beneficial to further elaborate on why raising fuel prices specifically would lead to long-term environmental benefits, and perhaps consider potential counterarguments or drawbacks.
task achievement
While the essay presents clear ideas and relevant examples, developing the argument further with more specific and varied examples would strengthen the response. For instance, discussing specific benefits observed in countries that have implemented similar measures, or the economic implications for low-income residents, could provide a more comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates strong logical structure, with clear progression from introduction, through main points, to a well-rounded conclusion.
task achievement
The ideas presented are relevant to the topic and contribute to a well-rounded argument. The use of specific examples, such as the Vietnamese government's policy, adds weight to the argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • public transport
  • fuel-efficient
  • electric vehicles
  • renewable energy
  • green technologies
  • disproportionately affect
  • commuting
  • infrastructure development
  • cycling and walking
  • deforestation
  • industrial pollution
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