IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph shows the number of people taking part in 4 kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005.. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
 graph illustrates the population of people who
play
Wrong verb form
played
show examples
 four different kinds of sports from 1985 to 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, it clearly displays that the
number
Use synonyms
 of rugby
players
Use synonyms
 dropped significantly,
while
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of tennis
players
Use synonyms
 increased throughout the period. Over 20 years, the population of badminton and basketball
players
Use synonyms
 remained relatively stable.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, rugby was the most popular
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport
show examples
, which had approximately 250
players
Use synonyms
 in 1985.
However
Linking Words
, it has shown a downward trend from 1985 to 2005,
became
Correct word choice
and became
show examples
 the least favourite
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport
show examples
 in 2005 by keeping nearly one-fifth of the
players
Use synonyms
 than in 1985.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, tennis had the second largest group of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
players
Use synonyms
 around 150 in 1985. After, it gained more popularity and has shown a moderate increase in their numbers. The population of tennis has overtaken the
number
Use synonyms
 of rugby
players
Use synonyms
 in 1995.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of badminton and basketball
players
Use synonyms
 remained relatively stable. Throughout the period, basketball had approximately 80 people in the group
whereas
Linking Words
 badminton had around 50 people respectively.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, players with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: