The best manager is one who is warm and friendly with their staff. Do agree or disagree?
There has been quite an obvious discussion about the topic of the best management.
While
some people believe that they should have a cold personality and also
be bossy, I would argue that the good ones should be kind and take care of their staff
, Which I will explain my reasons in the following paragraphs.
To begin
with, there is no doubt that seniors have to control a large number of staff
and that may lead them to have a seriously bad manner. This
is because controlling the team to achieve the target needs a powerful leader to lead the whole group in the same direction. For instance
, big company in Thailand, the managers are always serious and bossy with their members. As a result
, it could increase the staff
turnover rate and also
the absent rate.
On the other hand
, it is worth pointing out that leading people with good manners and kind behaviour would benefit more for both the company and management. This
is based on the fact that working in a good environment and friendship will make employees more willing to participate in the team and the company's goals. For example
, when brainstorming, if the manager has a good relationship with their staff
, they will get a variety of ideas from the members, as they are willing to support and also
they
can create an idea freely.
In conclusion, we can observe that the best manager should be the one who can encourage the team and Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
create a good environment at work. Overall
, I firmly agree with the statement.Submitted by v.mahatkomol on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structure more to create a more dynamic and engaging essay.
Task Achievement
Try to expand on your examples by providing more depth or details to strengthen your argument.
Introduction
Your introduction sets up the essay topic and your stance effectively.
Logical Structure
You have a clear logical structure that guides the reader through your arguments.
Examples
The use of examples to support your points, especially the Thai company example, effectively illustrates your argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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