In some countries, university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries, students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

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In the present time, it is believed by many individuals that finishing university in another

city

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or country away from their family is beneficial for

students

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while

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other people think that it can be hard for them. In my opinion, I consider that attending university away from home can bring about more advantages for

students

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compared to any problems it might bring. Despite the drawbacks below, I believe that the benefits

students

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might gain from studying in another

city

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are extremely useful for their future.

Firstly

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, it is an opportunity for them to develop their personality and to rely on themselves. To put it simply, when

students

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attend universities in the same

city

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they are more likely to rely on their parents and relatives for simple things

such

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as cooking and cleaning contrary to when they are alone.

This

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is to say that living alone away from home will help

students

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to take responsibility which will eventually lead to developing their personality.

Secondly

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students

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living in another country or

city

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will be more independent. To explain

further

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students

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will have the total freedom to go out and study at any time they want compared to when they are home where they have to follow a certain rhythm and rules. Admittedly, there are some issues involved when

students

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attend universities far from their cities. One problem is that it might expose them to some financial difficulties.

In other words

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students

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might face some issues with how to manage their budget which can sometimes lead them to start looking for a job to cover their daily expenses. Another negative aspect is that many

students

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suffer from homesickness.

This

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problem faces many

students

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who are not used to

Wrong verb form

being

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away from their families and relatives.

Thus

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, suffering from homesickness can affect

students

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' performance and may

also

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lead to bad results in their studies. In conclusion, the critical lessons that

students

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can learn when they study abroad or in another

city

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will help them to develop their personality and clearly outweigh any disadvantages

s_syedyWed Jun 12 2024

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coherence cohesion

To enhance the logical structure, consider organizing the essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.

task achievement

While the main points are supported, including more specific examples or evidence would strengthen your argument further.

coherence cohesion

Be mindful in balancing the length of your paragraphs to maintain coherence and readability.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, providing a clear setup and closure.

task achievement

The essay presents clear, comprehensive ideas that effectively address the prompt.

task achievement

The points about personality development and independence are well articulated and relevant.

coherence cohesion

Good use of cohesive devices like 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' 'Admittedly,' and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader through the argument.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5

7.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

7.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

7.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

339 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

independence
self-reliance
finance management
exposure
broaden horizons
open-minded
adaptability
conducive environment
isolation
homesickness
financial burden
household duties
academic responsibilities
personal growth

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In some countries, university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries, students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

Governments in many countries are replacing old buildings such as art galleries and town halls with new ones. Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some children spend every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

There have been many inventions in human history, such as wheels. Some people think the most important thing is the internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the enviroment. What do you think can be done to solve this problem?