IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that it is best to increase the fuel cost to reduce the pollution problems other think otherwise discuss both views and give your opinion

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Pollution
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 has undoubtedly been one of the major problems that apply to society is currently facing. Because of
this
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, the government has created a solution, which is increasing the
price
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 of
fuel
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 to reduce the
pollution
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 problem. Yet, some
people
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 believe that it is a horrible idea and stand firm to keep the
price
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 as it is today.
Hence
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, in
this
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 essay, I will discuss both views regarding
this
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 issue and present the reason
to
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apply
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why I firmly agree with not bringing the
price
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 of
fuel
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 up
due to
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 some reasons set out below. Gas pollutants have been one of the biggest problems that has been around for many years. The government believes by increasing the
price
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 of
fuel
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, fewer
people
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 will use
fuel
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 vehicles and it would solve the
pollution
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 problem.
For example
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, by increasing the
price
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,
people
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 will rather switch to an electric-based car. By doing so, the percentage of
fuel
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pollution
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 will decrease rapidly.
However
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, some
people
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 tend to believe that by increasing the
fuel
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price
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, not many
people
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 are going to switch to electric cars or bikes.
In contrast
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, society will start to suffer more
due to
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 the increasing
price
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 of
fuel
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.
For example
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, by increasing the
fuel
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price
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, more and more
people
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 will experience the economy downhill
instead
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 of buying electric cars. By doing so, it will result in poverty for more
people
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 throughout the middle and lower
economical
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economic
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 classes rather than solving the
pollution
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 problem.
To conclude
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, even though increasing the
fuel
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price
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to reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
 the
pollution
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 caused by
fuel
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, I stand firm in my decision that the advantages will not outweigh the disadvantages caused by it.

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Task Achievement
Try to elaborate more on the reasons why you agree with not increasing the fuel price. Provide additional arguments and examples to support your stance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs to enhance the overall flow. For instance, use phrases like 'On the other hand' or 'Conversely' to introduce contrasting points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Develop the ideas presented in each paragraph further. This will make your argument more compelling and provide more depth to your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, which helps in maintaining a logical structure.
Task Achievement
You have addressed both views on the topic, which demonstrates a thorough understanding of the task requirements.
Task Achievement
The essay clearly indicates the writer's opinion, which is well-articulated and easy to understand.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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