News plays an important part of most people’s lives. Why is news so important to people? Why is so much news dedicated to bad news? Should the news focus on good news instead?

Nowadays,
news
plays an important part
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
most
people
’s lives. But in the modern era, the
news
shows only bad situations in local or international
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments
show examples
. In
this
essay, I will discuss why the
news
so
Add a missing verb
is so
show examples
important for
people
, why it is
dedicating
Wrong verb form
dedicated
show examples
to bad
news
in many cases and
they
Rephrase
why they
show examples
should focus on good
news
instead
.
Firstly
, our communities used to watch
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
for getting
Change preposition
to get
show examples
information about the current situation in their local countries or cities. Some of them want to go somewhere for a vacation and need to know
an international
Remove the article
international news
a piece of international news
show examples
news
.
This
is the reason why
news
plays
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
key role in
people
’s lives.
Secondly
, the
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
why
news
depicts bad
news
is getting more attention
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
people
. No one will be interested in only good
news
without any actions
such
as crimes and murder etc.
For example
, we can draw a parallel with the movies.
People
are not interested in movies without some drama or comedy. From my point of view, the
news
should
also
focus on good
news
to give
people
understanding
Correct article usage
the understanding
show examples
that not only bad things are happening around them. It can be
news
about
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
achievements on
international
Add an article
an international
the international
show examples
level,
new
Correct word choice
or new
show examples
buildings
such
as parks and hospitals. The good
news
will create confidence
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
,
thus
that
people
won’t assemble for any
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
show examples
of rallies. In summary,
although
it is common to
belief
Replace the word
believe
show examples
that
news
is so important to
people
, in my I hold the view it is not. Sometimes it can disappoint
people
and make them live
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
stress.
Submitted by vladkruglovfencer on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Try to integrate more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, mention specific news events or instances where bad news gained more attention than good news.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on paragraph transitions to ensure smooth flow of ideas. This will make the essay easier to read and understand.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clarify your concluding statements to avoid confusion. Reiterate the main points succinctly to strengthen the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses all parts of the question, discussing the importance of news, the focus on bad news, and the suggestion that news should include more good news.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: