IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

You received a letter from your friend informing you that his elderly parents are coming to visit in your area and he is asking for your advice on - which places they should visit - where should they live - invite them to do something with you.

#friend #parents #visit #area #advice #places
Dear Joey, How are you? I received your letter yesterday seeking my advice on your parents’ visit to my hometown and how it can be made memorable. First of all, I strongly recommend your parents should visit The Hilton Era Park and The South Museum because of the numerous games and activities available for the elderly.
Additionally
, The Malboy Mall is not just one of the popular places to visit but
also
 gives an incredible experience of shopping.
Further
, regarding their accommodation, they should reside near the city centre because the motels and hotels there are economical and best in service. The one I know is The Ramada Hotel which will cost them just $50 for
one-night
Correct article usage
a one-night
show examples
 stay including breakfast in a deluxe room.
Apart from
this
, my family and I would love to invite your parents for fishing and a dance party at our place and if aunt wants, she can try her hand at my mom’s fish curry dish. I assure you
this
 trip will be wonderful for them. Yours lovingly, Jacob
Submitted by Mrjit147 on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific details about the places to visit, entertaining activities, and accommodation options to enhance the reader’s experience.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to maintain a consistent tone throughout the letter. The initial paragraph could be slightly more personal to align with the friendly tone of the concluding paragraph.
task achievement
The letter includes a clear response to all the points asked in the task, such as recommending tourist spots, suggesting accommodation, and extending an invitation.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs that develop each point, and a concluding statement.
coherence cohesion
The writing is generally clear and easy to follow, with comprehensive ideas and sufficient elaboration on each point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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