Some people think that children should learn to paint and draw. Others believe that is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
While
some people believe that children
have to know how could paint and draw, others do not believe this
opinion and say that is
not nessecary
to spend their time with that Correct your spelling
necessary
also
I believe the rather opinion.
Painting and drawing are so fantastic for childrens
pleasure times and give them Change to a genitive case
children's
fill
like being Verb problem
feel
relax
and calming down. When a person is doing some Wrong verb form
relaxed
artworks
her or his mind Fix the agreement mistake
artwork
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
empety
because of the activity which is doing Correct your spelling
empty
that is
very helpful for our conceious
. One of the most famous Correct your spelling
conscious
doctor
in England Change to a plural noun
doctors
have
done some Correct subject-verb agreement
has
researches
on Fix the agreement mistake
research
children
, he give
them a painting book and after one week saw their brain tape and realized their brains work more than Wrong verb form
gave
almoust
50% better than before painting these books.
Correct your spelling
almost
On the other hand
, there is a believe
that says painting for Replace the word
belief
children
is waste
of time. Correct article usage
a waste
Children
has
a lot of homework from their Change the verb form
have
school
and many activities which they do when they are at school
and there is not enough tiem
for doing Correct your spelling
time
another things
when they come back home and if they Replace the adjective
another thing
other things
want
do something like painting, they must have less rest Add the particle
want to
in
Change preposition
at
home
. It is very important for them when they are in grow Add an article
the home
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
do
not Correct your spelling
to
do
too much activity Fix the infinitive
to do
that
is
could Unnecessary verb
apply
destory
their Correct your spelling
destroy
grow
.
In conclusion, Replace the word
growth
Childreen
need time to Correct your spelling
children
be relax
to be able to learn their lessons in Change the verb form
be relaxed
be relaxing
school
and not to be tried. So it is better for them focus
on some more Add the particle
to focus
imprtant
subjects Correct your spelling
important
that
are their rest and Correct pronoun usage
apply
school
subjects which are usually alot
.Correct your spelling
a lot
Submitted by TUTOO on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph sticks to one clear main idea, with the supporting details logically connected. This will improve the overall logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Work on developing your main points with more specific examples and detailed explanations. This will provide a clearer and more comprehensive response to the task.
general
Proofread your essays to correct any small grammatical or syntactical errors that could affect readability. This will enhance the overall presentation of your response.
coherence cohesion
You have included an introduction and a conclusion, which provides a good structure to your essay.
task achievement
You have made an effort to present both sides of the argument, which is important for fully addressing the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.