Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that countries should allocate more funds to
education
than to leisure and competitive games. It is agreed that national budgets should prioritise schools and universities over sports and play. First,
I will discuss the economic benefits
that education
can bring to a nation and, secondly
, its social benefits
.
Investment in its education
system is one of the best ways to improve a country’s economy in the long term. The more students entering third-level education
, the more skilled a workforce will be, leading to higher innovation and productivity. For example
, South Korea and Finland decided to invest a large proportion of their budget in education
, and this
has reaped benefits
in the form of high-tech companies such
as Samsung and Nokia. However
, people cannot always work hard, and these companies provide leisure facilities for their workers.
Education
is not just about improving the economy; it also
has many social benefits
. Well-educated people tend to be more aware of social evils such
as drugs, alcohol and sexual health. For example
, Singapore educates all of its citizens on the dangers of drugs, resulting in one of the lowest levels of drug abuse in the world. Despite this
, sports can also
teach children valuable soft skills, such
as teamwork and work ethic, which also
help curb social ills.
In conclusion, education
should take precedence over sports when it comes to funding due to
the many socio-economic benefits
it brings. It is recommended that governments continue to pump money into schools and universities to realise long-term goals.Submitted by annzhr on
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task achievement
To achieve an even higher score, you could expand on the counterarguments slightly more to show balance.
coherence cohesion
Developing the conclusion by summarizing key points discussed in the essay can reinforce your argument and enhance your coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and logical structure, with an effective introduction and conclusion that encapsulate the main arguments.
task achievement
Your use of relevant and specific examples significantly strengthens the argument.
task achievement
You manage to cover both economic and social aspects comprehensively, which provides a balanced viewpoint.
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