In some countries celebrities have higher salaries than senior politicans. what is the reason? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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It is said that in some countries, celebrities are currently capable of having higher incomes in comparison to senior
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

politicans
Correct your spelling
politicians

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.
While
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there is a distinct reason for
this
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matter, I believe that it is a negative development that can cause bad after-effects. The reason for the higher salaries of celebrities is the power that media exposure allows them;
furthermore
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, their preferences and choices are able to impact those of their audience.
This
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matter results in various companies reaching out to them so that they showcase the company's products;
consequently
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, These types of partnerships lead to their gain of great income.
For instance
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, If a celebrity begins using a particular service, it occurs to their followers that the said service is of significant quality and importance;
thus
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the company earns more and in
turn
Add a comma
turn,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase in turn. Consider adding a comma.

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the same happens to the public figure.
While
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

development is solely caused by the public figure's likelihood, it might still result in negative consequences for the senior
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

politicans
Correct your spelling
politicians

If you don’t want politicans to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

. As the power of each individual is mostly recognized by their wealth,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

politicans
Correct your spelling
politicians

If you don’t want politicans to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

might appear to be of less importance and power than the former group. Taking into account that they have a great role in leading the country, their lower profile might cause lesser obeyance from citizens;
thus
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, taking away from their authority. In conclusion,
although
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

celebrities deserve to amass a noticeable fortune
due to
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

their social
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours

The spelling of endeavors is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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, it has a bad impact on other professions
such
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as senior
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Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

politicans
Correct your spelling
politicians

If you don’t want politicans to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

who are vital members of any country.
Overall
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
reduction
Correct article usage
a reduction

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of their earnings may be a feasible plan for attending to
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

matter.

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Example specificity
Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, mentioning specific celebrities or case studies could make your essay more compelling.
Balanced Argument
Consider exploring both sides of the argument more thoroughly to provide a more balanced view. Your essay strongly leans towards the negative aspects; including benefits could enrich your discussion.
Structure
You have done a great job in structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
Flow
Your essay flows well, with each paragraph logically leading into the next. This makes your argument easy to follow.
Cohesion
You effectively use connecting words to maintain coherence throughout your essay, which enhances its readability.
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