In some countries celebrities have higher salaries than senior politicans. what is the reason? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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It is said that in some countries, celebrities are currently capable of having higher incomes in comparison to senior

Use synonyms

politicans

Correct your spelling

politicians

While

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there is a distinct reason for

this

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matter, I believe that it is a negative development that can cause bad after-effects. The reason for the higher salaries of celebrities is the power that media exposure allows them;

furthermore

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, their preferences and choices are able to impact those of their audience.

This

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matter results in various companies reaching out to them so that they showcase the company's products;

consequently

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, These types of partnerships lead to their gain of great income.

For instance

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, If a celebrity begins using a particular service, it occurs to their followers that the said service is of significant quality and importance;

thus

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, the company earns more and in

turn

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turn,

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the same happens to the public figure.

While

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this

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development is solely caused by the public figure's likelihood, it might still result in negative consequences for the senior

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politicans

Correct your spelling

politicians

. As the power of each individual is mostly recognized by their wealth,

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politicans

Correct your spelling

politicians

might appear to be of less importance and power than the former group. Taking into account that they have a great role in leading the country, their lower profile might cause lesser obeyance from citizens;

thus

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, taking away from their authority. In conclusion,

although

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celebrities deserve to amass a noticeable fortune

due to

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their social

endeavors

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endeavours

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, it has a bad impact on other professions

such

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as senior

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politicans

Correct your spelling

politicians

who are vital members of any country.

Overall

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reduction

Correct article usage

a reduction

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of their earnings may be a feasible plan for attending to

this

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matter.

viana.elahiMon Apr 08 2024

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Example specificity

Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, mentioning specific celebrities or case studies could make your essay more compelling.

Balanced Argument

Consider exploring both sides of the argument more thoroughly to provide a more balanced view. Your essay strongly leans towards the negative aspects; including benefits could enrich your discussion.

Structure

You have done a great job in structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

Flow

Your essay flows well, with each paragraph logically leading into the next. This makes your argument easy to follow.

Cohesion

You effectively use connecting words to maintain coherence throughout your essay, which enhances its readability.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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In some countries celebrities have higher salaries than senior politicans. what is the reason? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their work place at home, when traveling. Do the bed benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?

Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

Some people say Olympics games does not play a role in the 21st century. Do you agree or disagree

Some people think that getting old is a negative thing, whereas others think it is much easier for people to live in modern society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.