Some people think that it is necessary to travel to learn about other countries. Others feel same can be learnt through TV and internet. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #travel #countries #learnt #tv #internet

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In recent years, numerous

people

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have assumed that

television

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and the

internet

Use synonyms

could be

media

Use synonyms

transfers to study other

nations

Use synonyms

. Meanwhile, there are individuals who believe that travelling abroad is the best way and essential to know more about other

nations

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both views and state my own opinion.

To begin

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with, it is undeniable that some individuals believe that

television

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and the

internet

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could be

media

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for learning about other country and their cultures. There is a reason behind

this

Linking Words

statement. Since we live in a modern world in which all the information is easy to access and widespread on the

internet

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, is seen as a positive development for several

people

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Therefore

Linking Words

, they assume learning can be effective just through

media

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such

Linking Words

as Google on the

Internet

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, YouTube,

television

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, and radio.

Moreover

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, they do not need to spend a lot of their money going abroad just to study the diversity which they can find in the

media

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too.

On the other hand

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, in my point of view, visiting overseas has plenty of advantages and essentials to get to know about the diversity in

this

Linking Words

world.

However

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, technology has grown rapidly and travelling abroad become easier and more convenient.

Therefore

Linking Words

people

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nowadays are more attracted to learning about other cultures and believe that travelling is more crucial than just learning it by screening.

Besides

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, when

people

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visit other

nations

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, they will have two ways of communicating with local

people

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and other foreigners which is that you cannot find when you just surf on

television

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or other.

Moreover

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, talking to other

people

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can enhance communication and know better about their culture. In conclusion,

although

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understanding other countries could be found on the

internet

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or by reading information. but I still believe travelling overseas is necessary in order to have a deep and full understanding of the culture in other

nations

Use synonyms

Submitted by patricius.yohanes on Fri Jun 14 2024

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task achievement

While the essay addresses both views and provides a position, it would benefit from more specific examples and detailed explanations to strengthen the arguments.

coherence cohesion

Try to ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and strong supporting sentences to improve coherence.

language

There are some minor grammatical errors and awkward phrases; revising for accuracy and fluency would enhance clarity.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps the reader understand the main points being made.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

312 words

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Some people think that it is necessary to travel to learn about other countries. Others feel same can be learnt through TV and internet. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You recently completed a course and you borrowed a book from your teacher, which you couldn't return in time. You would like to return the book now. Write a lefter to your teacher and say What book was it How helpful was the book Explain why you couldn't return it in time.

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer , rather than playing sports or doing exercises classes. What are the reason for this ? Is this a positive or a negative development ?

Some people think that adverts control what we purchase, while orthers think they are useful sources of information on products. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

In many countries today, everyday necessities like food and petrol have become very expensive. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, can/should be done about it?

The figure below provide information on the number of people per 100,000 found guilty of reckless driving offences in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.