IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nuclear technology not only offers a lot of advantages but also threatens the world with its danger. The use of this technology should be discouraged. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nuclear
technology
Use synonyms
 not only brings merits but
also
Linking Words
 has a bad impact on the nation with its power. I completely agree that nuclear
technology
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 should be discouraged because it depletes essential
resources
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 and raises serious
health
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 issues. Nuclear
technology
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 leads to the depletion of essential
resources
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.
In other words
Linking Words
 , nuclear power plants are one of the essential fuels for the supply of
energy
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 which uses vast amounts of nuclear
energy
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 .
This
Linking Words
energy
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 is depleted by the scientist for experiment purposes .
For instance
Linking Words
 , Scientists
use
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this
Linking Words
energy
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 for the supply of rockets which could be blasted anytime .
Thus
Linking Words
, scientists should
use
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 a better version of essential fuel so that it provides safety measures on the side.
This
Linking Words
technology
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 harmful impact on human
health
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 . Many scientists in the world
use
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this
Linking Words
energy
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 for various purposes but the harmful gases released from nuclear
technology
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 can cause cancer in humans .
For example
Linking Words
 , It has been shown that the experiments conducted in the UK lab
use
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this
Linking Words
energy
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 and workers who used
this
Linking Words
technology
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 suffered from skin cancer .
Thus
Linking Words
 ,
this
Linking Words
technology
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 should be discouraged. In conclusion , the
use
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 of nuclear
technology
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 should be banned because it leads to the depletion of essential
resources
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 and has harmful effects on men's and women's
health
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. It leads to the depletion of main
resources
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 and impacts on human
health
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 too.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. Avoid mixing different points that might confuse the reader.
task achievement
Improve the range of vocabulary and refine sentence structures to make the writing more sophisticated and fluent.
task achievement
When providing examples, make them more specific and directly related to the main point being discussed.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your essay.
task achievement
Your stance on the issue is clearly stated, and you provide relevant reasons to support your opinion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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