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Band 5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative solutions?

#countries #home #people #be #case
Possessing a
house
 is perceived to be more important than renting one for some
people
 in several countries. In my opinion,
this
 is a negative solution.
This
 essay will
further
 elaborate on the reasons from the point of view of the younger generation.
Firstly
, we know that shelter is one of the primary things that humans need.
However
, a
house
 is not something that affordable to everyone. Owning a home is no longer a basic need, but it
also
 become a luxury for some
people
. The price of land that keeps increasing each year could be one of the problems why
people
 are hesitant to buy a
house
. Take Singapore
for example
. Since it is not a big country in terms of size, the land is
also
 limited causing it to be too expensive to afford especially for young
people
.
Furthermore
, a job can
also
 be a reason for not possessing a
house
.
For instance
, some companies offer a housing facility for the employee to live
.
Change preposition
in.
show examples
Therefore
, the younger generation can have better options to spend their money on something else
such
 as
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
.
To conclude
, owning a
house
 is
such
 a privilege in some countries because of the price, and the level of urgency.
However
, it could be considered more, if the option for rent is more appealing.
Submitted by jermias.darondo89 on

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task achievement
To achieve a higher score in task achievement, ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task. Provide a balanced view and more in-depth analysis of both the reasons for owning a home and the implications of this trend being positive or negative.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence and cohesion by using a wider range of linking words and phrases. This will help to create a more logical flow of ideas and make your essay more engaging and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the support for your main points by providing additional examples or evidence. This will make your arguments more convincing and comprehensive.
accuracy
Be mindful of small grammatical and lexical errors. Improving accuracy in these areas will enhance the clarity and professionalism of your writing.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the discussion effectively.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally sound, making it easy to follow your line of reasoning.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples, such as the situation in Singapore, to support your points.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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