IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The map below shows a park and its surroundings in 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The map below shows a park and its surroundings in 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#park #surroundings #information #features #comparisons
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the maps illustrate the development of the
garden
park
 in 1920 and now.
it is clear that
 there have been several changes mainly in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of the
garden
 over the given period and
also
 there is no alteration in some parts of
Correct article usage
the grance
show examples
grance
Correct your spelling
France
park
such
 as
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both entrances and the rose
garden
 on the north side of the
park
. it is
also
 worth mentioning that
Correct article usage
the
show examples
glass door has been replaced by
water
Add an article
a water
show examples
 feature on the
south west
Correct your spelling
southwest
show examples
 of the
park
. the elimination of the pond which was used for watering the plants is one of the significant changes.
moreover
 , they built
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
childern
Correct your spelling
children
children's
 playground in
this
 part of the
park
. next to the
playground
Add a comma
playground,
show examples
 there is a cafe
instead
 of the
pervious
Correct your spelling
previous
show examples
 rose
garden
.
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
furthermore
, the number of
rose
Add an article
the rose
show examples
garden
Fix the agreement mistake
gardens
show examples
 has been reduced . in
further
 detail, several seats have been added to the
park
 for more convenience .
also
Add a comma
also,
show examples
 the new rose
garden
 has been erected in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of
park
Add an article
the park
show examples
 ,
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 is
surronded
Correct your spelling
surrounded
 by many seats. the rose
garden
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
used to be a fountain.
in addition
, the
improvment
Correct your spelling
improvement
 of
stage
Correct article usage
the stage
show examples
 and made into the
ampitheatre
Correct your spelling
amphitheatre
 is a considerable difference in these maps.
Submitted by yasaman.bozorgzad9 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words garden, park with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • pond
  • northwest corner
  • large central open area
  • residential areas
  • community-oriented space
  • playground
  • eastern border
  • parking lot
  • convenience
  • commercial zone
  • amenities
  • walking path
  • encircles
  • joggers
  • accessible
  • entrances
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