IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

A large company In your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, alter to sponsor a local children’s sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public. Write a letter to the company, In your letter describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team summaries the benefits of paying for the concerts say how you think the company should spend the money

#company #area #amount #money #sponsor #children’s #sports #team #two #years #concerts #feedback #summaries
Dear Sir or Madam, I hope
this
 letter finds you well. I am writing
this
 letter to express my interest in the sponsorships that your
company
 looking to do. It is a productive way to encourage the local community to show interest in sports or any other concert activity that can become a source of livelihood. Sponsoring a sports team has tremendous benefits,
such
 as improving their skills through the sponsorship amount and presenting their community at the national or international level, which will benefit your
company
 as well, to get more popular among people.
Moreover
, funding for a concert is
also
 an excellent approach to get our culture alive and famous. By doing so, your
company
 will get benefits
such
 as advertising products and ads through these concerts. Both platforms are beneficial, but sponsoring a sports team will make more of a difference as it will provide financial aid to many players rather than funding a single dancer or singer. Thank you for considering
this
 matter, and best wishes for the
company
's future success. Yours faithfully, GS
Submitted by gurhunjjan47 on

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task achievement
Make sure to provide a more detailed, balanced comparison between sponsoring the sports team and funding the concerts, including potential drawbacks and further benefits for both options.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, elaborated with supporting details.
task achievement
The letter demonstrates an appropriate and respectful tone, suitable for addressing a company.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are well-structured and create a positive, polite impression.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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