Cyber insecurity is a rising problem in many countries. What problems does a lack of cyber security cause to Internet users? What solutions can you suggest to solve it?

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Cyber
insecurity has escalated in many countries, which has exacerbated their aftermaths for users regarding material and psychological aspects. There are some potential solutions that could eradicate
this
issue.
Initially
, the chief corollary was personal information
theft
and fraud in illegal activities. There is a plethora of identity
theft
sold on the dark web, leading to many ramifications for individuals.
Cyber
wrongdoers can use these private data to set up bank accounts that support their money laundering procedures. By accessing these personal data,
cyber
offenders could execute their blackmail plans for their target victims,
such
as elderly citizens who have inadequate knowledge and awareness. They usually call their victims to notice a specific illegal action, requiring them to provide some additional information like OTP online bank verification numbers. They could penetrate their victim devices through some popular software based on previous data
theft
, before taking control permissions.
Consequently
, there is an increase in the number of victims
due to
the deteriorated security level, who reported financial losses when they checked their online banking transactions.
While
, there is plenty of sensitive personal information leaked in the public forum, which could be used as blackmail products to deal with its owners and sell into the dark web.
For example
, some celebrities are criticised after being leaked their private communication with immoral and violent actions.
However
, the most effective solution is the governmental intervention. The collaboration among governmental departments to refine and strengthen judicial regulations involving
cyber
criminal activities could deter some intended convicts.
For instance
, enhancing the security extent in all commercial banking, particularly using biometric verification, could eradicate all money fraud. Conducting penetration testing to identify vulnerabilities, before patching in some software could minimize potential risks from
cyber
offenders. Meanwhile, pouring money and endeavours to build a firewall can eradicate many criminal plots from foreign offenders and limit identity
theft
to an extent.
To conclude
, financial losses and psychological damage are the main ramifications of cybercrime.
This
phenomenon can be addressed by governmental intervention including tightening regulations, enhancing security levels in commercial banking and investing in the national firewall.
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task achievement
You have addressed the task well by identifying the problems caused by cyber insecurity and suggesting solutions. However, you could improve the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas by avoiding overly complex sentences that may confuse the reader.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is logically structured, with a clear introduction and conclusion, ensuring smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs can strengthen coherence. Try to use linking phrases more effectively to connect your points.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to fully develop each point you make with well-explained examples. This will add depth to your essay and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both the problems and solutions related to cyber insecurity.
task achievement
You have included specific and relevant examples, which make your points more convincing and relatable.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, which helps to frame the essay nicely.
coherence cohesion
The essay is logically structured, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybersecurity
  • data breaches
  • malware
  • phishing attacks
  • identity theft
  • encryption
  • firewalls
  • antivirus software
  • two-factor authentication
  • public awareness campaigns
  • regulations
  • cybercriminals
  • digital hygiene
  • system vulnerabilities
  • data protection laws
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