You are planning a holiday in another country and would like a friend to accompany you. Write a letter to the friend asking him/her to join you and explain: - Why are you taking a holiday? - What is your holiday plan? - Why would you like him/her to go with you?

#holiday #country #friend #plan

Dear Desi, I hope you are doing great, long time

not

Correct your spelling

show examples

see I remember the

last

time I met with you

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

last

summer. First I am writing

this

letter to tell you about some of my

plan

Change to a plural noun

plans

show examples

That is

I will

going

Change the form of the verb

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

holiday next month to

Sembalun

, as you know,

Sembalun

is the best place I want

visit

Add the particle

to visit

show examples

and I want you able to join

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

me. let me tell you about what we will doing. As you know.

lately

Add a comma

lately,

show examples

I feel very

boried

Correct your spelling

bored

, and tired because of my

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

. that way I want

going

Change the verb form

to go

show examples

to some picturesque

view

Fix the agreement mistake

views

show examples

such

Sembalun

. I hear

Sembalun

great

Correct article usage

a great

show examples

village

surrounding

Wrong verb form

surrounded

show examples

breathking

Correct your spelling

breathtaking

view

Fix the agreement mistake

views

show examples

and

faboulus

Correct your spelling

fabulous

hills. I will be going to the place as soon as possible, I have

plan

Add an article

a plan

show examples

for booking

Change preposition

to book

show examples

some vila and we can stay 3 days here. not only that I

also

want go to hiking the Nanggi Hill and Savana. do not

wory

Correct your spelling

worry

about the equipment , I

Verb problem

have

show examples

already

fix

Wrong verb form

fixed

show examples

it. The reason I would like you to go with me

because

Add a missing verb

is because

show examples

, you know I am not very know about the village. and you have

Wrong verb form

gone

show examples

Sembalun

before. So, I think you can help me find

the

Correct article usage

show examples

good vila and

best

Correct article usage

the best

show examples

place

for living

Change preposition

to live

show examples

. Thank you for your attention and I am Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Sincerely Nurul

Submitted by patricius.yohanes on Sat Jun 15 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Try to improve your grammar and sentence structure. For instance, "I will going to holiday" should be "I will be going on holiday".

coherence cohesion

Work on your paragraph structure. Some paragraphs have multiple ideas which can confuse the reader. Separate your points clearly.

task achievement

The letter has a friendly and suitable tone which is appropriate for the task.

task achievement

You've included all the necessary points: reason for the holiday, the holiday plan, and why you want your friend to join you.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

230 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
In contemporary epoch, it is believed that government ought to invest a large sum of money on railways rather than roads. I agree with the statement since it will contribute to faster and high quality transportation system.
7
band
Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.
In our fast-paced and digital society, the phenomenon of the impacts of technology on our lives has long been a subject of controversial debate. Some people contend that it has brought individuals together, while others allege that it has separated us. In the forthcoming paragraphs, this essay will elucidate both perspectives and provide a logical conclusion from my standpoint.
8
band
You have just come back from a holiday overseas. When you arrived back, you discovered that the airline had lost your suitcase. Write to the Customer Relations department of the airline. In the letter,  explain the situation  describe the suitcase and its contents  say what you want the airline to do  Write at least 150 words.  You do NOT need to write any addresses.
I am writing to request information regarding my lost suitcase during my flight from Singapore to Sydney on the 28th of May 2024.
<4
band
You recently attended a metting at a hotel. When you retured home, you found you had left some important papenrs at the hotel. ●say where you think you left the papers ●explain why they are so important ●tell the manager what you want him/her to do
I am writimg to solve some of my problems. I recently attend a meeting, when I came home I found that I forget some important papers in your hotel.
4.5
band
‘’Prevention is better than cure.’’ Researching and treating diseases is too costly , so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. Do you agree or disagree with the given statement ?
There are a lot of disesae in the world and that diseases’ cures are very high. If they can found preventative from these diesase, it will be cheaper and more sensible. I think, absolutely researchers should study on the preventative and it will be more beneficial for world.

You are planning a holiday in another country and would like a friend to accompany you. Write a letter to the friend asking him/her to join you and explain: - Why are you taking a holiday? - What is your holiday plan? - Why would you like him/her to go with you?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

You recently attended a metting at a hotel. When you retured home, you found you had left some important papenrs at the hotel. ●say where you think you left the papers ●explain why they are so important ●tell the manager what you want him/her to do

‘’Prevention is better than cure.’’ Researching and treating diseases is too costly , so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. Do you agree or disagree with the given statement ?