Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some
individuals
believe that
people
are more dependent on
others
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays,
while
others
think dwellers hold the opposite point. From my perspective, I consider that
individuals
rely on
others
more often than before. There could be a couple of reasons why a portion of
individuals
suppose that
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
are more independent than in the past.
First,
the advancement of
techonology
Correct your spelling
technology
can
assit
Correct your spelling
assist
people
in their daily lives, rendering they do not need help from
others
.
For example
, some artificial
intellengence softwares
Correct your spelling
intelligence software
like Open
Ai
Correct your spelling
AI
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
tapped into handling users' problems in studying and emotions by giving specific
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
.
Therefore
, citizens no longer bother other
people
to give
aids
Fix the agreement mistake
aid
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
them.
Second,
nowadays' education systems
also
play an important role in
pursuading
Correct your spelling
persuading
people
to become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
independent person. It is widely known that more and more schools require students to put more efforts
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
community
servieces
Correct your spelling
services
service
, which is even related to their GPA.
Hence
, students who attend
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
those projects are prone to gain
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
necessary life skills, resulting making
individuals
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
more independent from a young age.
In contrast
, I agree with
people
who believe
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
are more in need with each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
. First of all, tasks in modern society are much more complex than before, signifying that
individuals
are not able to handle them all by themselves,
thus
cooperating with
others
becoming inevitable in
people'
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives.
For instance
, in recent years, some investment projects contain
much
Fix the agreement mistake
many
show examples
more processes including investigation, communication, selling and risk management, which need
people
from different departments gathered to tackle them.
Furthermore
,
people
tend to have more mental issues than before, which makes them need other
individuals
'
assitance
Correct your spelling
assistance
.
Due to
the fact that lower employment, higher pressure and crime rate
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays, the standard of mental situation is getting worse.
Consequently
, dwellers have
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
possibility of being depressed. In that case,
individuals
need other
people
like their friends,
parents
Correct word choice
and parents
show examples
to help them get through the difficult time.
Therefore
, they rely on other
people
more often. In conclusion,
although
some
people
suppose
people
are more independent because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
influence of nowadays
techonology
Correct your spelling
technology
and education, I consider that cooperation and mental
assisstance
Correct your spelling
assistance
make citizens need each other more frequently than before.
Submitted by 1356388645 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

complete response
A clear position on the topic is maintained throughout the essay.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates the writer's opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • interdependence
  • globalization
  • technological advancements
  • collective action
  • digital evolution
  • minimal reliance
  • direct interaction
  • empowered
  • access to technology
  • societal expectations
  • personal choice
  • leverage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: