IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that individuals cannot improve environment, but only governments and big companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #individuals #environment #governments #companies #difference
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Environmental issues have long been a concern for many, and today, no one would deny the importance of protecting the environment. As for how to achieve
this
Linking Words
 end, I think it calls for collective actions from
individuals
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, big companies and the
government
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. It is indisputable that some environmental problems people are facing today may seem too big for
individuals
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 to address alone,
such
Linking Words
 as climate change, energy crisis, ozone depletion and so forth.
Consequently
Linking Words
, many people have the misconception that only the
government
Use synonyms
 and large companies have the authority, funds and manpower to solve them. Unfortunately,
such
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 an attitude is merely something that stems from ignorance or
illusion
Correct article usage
an illusion
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 of
inadequency
Correct your spelling
inadequacy
. The fact is that without individual efforts, any rules and regulations or large projects designed to improve the environment will, without a doubt, end in failure. So
individuals
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' participation is necessary and actually irreplace
along with
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 the actions taken by the
government
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 and big companies. More importantly, it is universally acknowledged that all the seemingly little things people do in daily lives, when added up, make a huge difference in contributing to solutions,
for example
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, recycling household waste, reducing
evergy
Correct your spelling
energy
 consumption
such
Linking Words
 as water and electricity, refusing the use of non-biodegradable or disposable products like plastic bags and one-off chopsticks, and taking more public transportation rather than driving around in private cars. Plainly, all the above-mentioned actions or endeavours
individuals
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 do can greatly bring down
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 carbon footprints.
Overall
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, if more
individuals
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 start to make a change in their daily lives, a brand new environmental status quo might come into existence. From what has been discussed and analyzed above, I think it is a comprehensive task to tackle the environmental problems, which necessitates the coordination and collaboration of
individuals
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, enterprises and the
government
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, even at an international level.
Nonetheless
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, one thing that must be certain is that any efforts would be less effective without
individuals
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' involvement.
Submitted by christianwang on

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language
Avoid small language inaccuracies for a more polished essay. For example, 'inadequency' should be 'inadequacy', and 'irreplace' should be 'irreplaceable'.
content
Try to provide even more specific examples or detailed cases to strengthen the argument further.
content
The essay provides a well-rounded response, acknowledging both individual and institutional responsibilities.
structure
There is a clear logical structure with a good introduction and conclusion.
support
The main points are well-supported with relevant examples and explanations.
language
The language used is generally clear and precise, maintaining a formal tone throughout.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • carbon footprint
  • renewable energy
  • conservation
  • corporate social responsibility
  • policy implementation
  • grassroots movement
  • environmental advocacy
  • legislation
  • systemic change
  • collective impact
  • green initiatives
  • pollution control
  • biodiversity
  • global warming
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