In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

Some
people
argue that governments have problems because of an ageing
population
,
while
others believe that more elderly
people
give
benefits
to society. In
this
essay, I will explain why the
benefits
of having an ageing
population
overshadow the potential drawbacks. On the one hand, the existence of an old-age
population
could pose two challenges to governments.
Firstly
, if
people
live longer, they may need to be supported financially by the government. When they have retired and cannot save their income at a productive age, they will struggle to fulfil their daily necessities in their retirement. Their family may support their needs, but elderly
people
usually do not want to inconvenience their family members.
Secondly
, if they experience age-related illness, it will impact the health systems. To illustrate, as they get older, most of them suffer complications.
Consequently
, the treatment cost will be even higher. Because of
this
, they take up resources needed by other
people
in society.
On the other hand
, I would argue that having an old-age
population
offers more
benefits
to governments.
First,
they are an asset to the economy. Because of their experience and the excellent competencies that they have, they are frequently asked about their considerations to overcome problems and minimize potential loss.
Furthermore
, they
also
become the leaders or catalysts for achieving targets in teams of younger age. Another important point is that they are an asset for the society. After retirement, they are productive by helping working parents to babysit, spending money as consumers, and even doing charitable work. In conclusion,
while
having an ageing
population
might cause the government to give financial support and cope with health systems, they show valuable economic and societal contributions.
Therefore
, on balance, I remain firmly convinced that the drawbacks are eclipsed by the
benefits
.
Submitted by alfinkarimah008 on

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task achievement
While the essay presents a balanced argument, ensure all points are equally well-developed. The challenges related to the health system could use more specific examples or data.
coherence cohesion
To enhance clarity, use signposting words more effectively to connect ideas within paragraphs. This will help in guiding the reader through your arguments smoothly.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, providing a clear summary of the main points discussed.
task achievement
The essay makes a solid attempt to address both sides of the issue, offering a comprehensive response to the prompt.
task achievement
The use of relevant examples, such as the financial struggle of retirees and their contributions post-retirement, strengthens the arguments.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
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