Some people think robots are very important to humans' future development while others think they are dangerous and have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion

I may understand
the
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apply
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both opinions,the people who say it's dangerous
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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think that the
robots
will
may
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apply
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get out of control in the future, it may be right,
however
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however,
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the other side
disagree
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disagrees
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with them,they say the
robots
will make life easy for us, in my
opiniont
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opinion
that is
true
in side
Correct your spelling
inside
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and not in the other side because if the
robots
will make our life easy
i
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I
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though
Correct your spelling
thought
show examples
of jobs that the
robots
will take it from us
Submitted by ahmedaziz9811 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Start with an introduction that introduces the topic and offers some background. End with a conclusion that summarizes the main points and reaffirms your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical structure by clearly separating and elaborating on each viewpoint. Use separate paragraphs for discussing the dangers and benefits of robots, and clearly state your opinion in a separate paragraph.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention specific industries where robots could either be beneficial or harmful.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are fully explained and connected to the main point you are making. Use linking phrases and sentences to make the text more cohesive and easier to follow.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address both sides of the argument, which is good for task achievement.
task achievement
The opinion is clearly stated, showing that you understand the need to provide your own viewpoint.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • automation
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • hazardous environments
  • personalized learning
  • job displacement
  • economic inequality
  • social unrest
  • privacy concerns
  • surveillance capabilities
  • malfunction
  • reliance
  • technical failures
  • human skills
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