IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

task 2: Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcycles are banned from the city center. People are encouraged to use public transportation such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free days. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#cities #vehicle-free #cars #trucks #motorcycles #city #center #people #transportation #buses #taxis #metro
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There is no denying the fact that with
increasing
Add an article
an increasing
the increasing
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 number of people,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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transportation’s
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transportation
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 problems increase.
while
 it is a commonly held belief that some cities have vehicle-free days, where private cars, trucks and motorcycles are not allowed to enter the city
center
Change the spelling
centre
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, there is
also
 an argument that opposes it.
This
 essay will analyse
this
 topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, encouraging individuals to use public transportation could reduce
the
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apply
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greenhouses
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greenhouse
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 gases.
In other words
, cars are one of the crucial reasons
of
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for
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 pollution and when we
declined
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decline
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 the number of
cars’
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cars
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uses
Wrong verb form
used
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 that could help to improve our environment.
In addition
, nowadays several cities suffer from crowded and traffic transportation, so that could
a
Add a missing verb
be a
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potential solution.
For instance
, when Japan established its metro
that
Correct pronoun usage
it
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 minimized the
crowded
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crowd
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 in various high streets and reduced the
noises
Fix the agreement mistake
noise
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.
On the other hand
, some people have special needs, so they cannot ride a bus and taxis are highly cost.
Moreover
, if we prevent cars, motorcycles and trucks, many private interests of people and companies will be disrupted.
For example
, if you are hungry and deliver pizza, your
deliver
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delivery
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 will be late
due to
this
 law. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
 question. On
balanced
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balance
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,
however
, I tend to believe that
this
 protocol could help our environment
at
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in
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 the long term.
Submitted by n.a.s.2 on

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task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the prompt, discussing both advantages and disadvantages of vehicle-free days. However, you could strengthen your response by providing more specific examples and elaborating on certain points.
coherence cohesion
There is a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. To improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly by using linking words and phrases.
supported main points
Your main points are clear but could be better supported with additional details and specific examples. This would help to further substantiate your arguments.
task achievement
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages of vehicle-free days, showing a balanced approach to the topic.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion summarizes the key points and provides a final opinion, which helps to wrap up your essay neatly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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