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In some countries, parents prefer to teach children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of homeschooling outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #parents #children #home #school
Some nations believe, that schools are not the most efficient way to teach their kids, so they teach them by themselves. I think
this
 is a better way to let young
people
study
 a lot
efficiently
Correct quantifier usage
more efficiently
show examples
.
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, schools
also
 have their upsides in
educational
Add an article
the educational
show examples
 system. Nowadays, parents prefer to teach their children at
home
.
This
 way, children can always be in contact with their family and
also
 feel support from them, if they struggle at some point.
And
Correct word choice
Also
show examples
also
 parents can pay more attention to their "student", which is more reliable than having 20-30 students
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
one
 class.
For instance
,
according to
 Renewable Energy Institute sources,
home
study
 allows for a healthier
study
-life balance, more suited to modern living. I believe,
this
 method is actually more reliable, just because
this
 type of education is very secure and individual, which means, students are going to feel better during classes rather than in
school
 and some major
school
 problems,
such
 as vaping, bullying
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
etc., will be easier to deal with.
On the other hand
, there are some factors, that keep many parents away from
home
-education.
One
 of them is the fact, that
school
 actually doesn'
t
 just tell students to
study
this
, learn
this
 and other stuff. Schools actually boost young
people
's communication skills,
Correct word choice
and logics
show examples
logics
Fix the agreement mistake
logic
show examples
 and
trains
Correct subject-verb agreement
train
show examples
 their brains with
this
 amount of information,
while
home
 studying doesn'
t
 guarantee you these vital abilities in life.
For example
,
while
 studying at
home
, you don'
t
 actually interact with anyone,
besides
 your teacher and family,
while
 in
school
, you are always among
people
 just like you, with different thoughts and opinions. I guess, discussing
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
literally anything with these
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
 of
people
 can help you discover something new too.
Overall
, there are some major advantages and disadvantages
about
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 topic. I can'
t
 really tell which of these two
outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
show examples
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
one
. Children can be under
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
massive control. And every student has their opinion on it. Someone would love it, someone would hate it. It's just practically impossible to find
one
 particular method that would motivate every kid to
study
. I would predict that controversy about
school
 education will still exist after several centuries.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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organization
Work on developing more structured arguments and clear paragraph transitions to enhance the logical flow of the essay.
development
Ensure that all main points are fully developed with relevant examples, explanations, and analysis to provide a stronger task achievement.
task response
Continue to focus on summarizing main ideas in the conclusion but try to provide a clearer stance or a more definitive opinion in the conclusion part.
content
Good attempt at addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of homeschooling and traditional schooling.
example
You have highlighted relevant and specific examples which enhance the credibility of your arguments.
organization
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in making your response more comprehensive.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Homeschooling
  • Tailored educational approaches
  • One-on-One Attention
  • Safe Learning Environment
  • Cost-Effective
  • Family Bonding
  • Limited Socialization
  • Potential Knowledge Gaps
  • Regulatory Challenges
  • Dependence on Parental Commitment
  • Limited Extracurricular Opportunities
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