Write about the following topic. Recently, abortion increases rapidly and becomes a controversial topic. Some people suppose that abortion should be legal while others are against it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
It is a fact that nowadays, abortion
increases
Wrong verb form
is increasing
fastly
. It might be Rephrase
fast
due to
the medical system has improved, the
religion has Correct article usage
apply
powerless
and society has changed.
Add a missing verb
been powerless
However
, society depends on what country we focus.
In developed cities Change preposition
on.
its
culture is opener than others. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Moreover
, actually having a child is harder. The cost of living has increased notably, and salaries keep the same ciffres
, Correct your spelling
differs
therefore
population
Correct article usage
the population
have
not enough financial resources. Some Add a missing verb
does have
goverments
offer special Correct your spelling
governments
aids
, Fix the agreement mistake
aid
however
it is not common.
That might be the reason why many women decide to abort, Add a comma
however,
due to
they are not ready for that moment.
Change preposition
apply
Nonetheless
, there are some laws to not allow abort
after the first 3 months. After these 3 months, the Replace the word
abortion
baby
is considered more constituted, and it is real
and dangerous issue if the mother aborts.
On Add an article
a real
the real
other
hand, in countries where Correct article usage
the other
the
religion has an important place, aborting is considered Correct article usage
apply
as
Change preposition
apply
a
murder. It does not matter if the Correct article usage
apply
baby
has 1, 2, or 3 moths
of living. It has Correct your spelling
months
live
inside itselfFix the infinitive
to live
,
Correct word choice
and, therefore
therefore
is completely forbidden. However
, population
do not realize how the Correct article usage
the population
baby
's life will be if the parents have
not enough resources to keep a good life for it.
In my experience, I took some pills for the after day to avoid Add a missing verb
do have
be
pregnant. Without Change the form of the verb
being
this
, my life right now would be very different.
In my opinion, having a child is not a game. We must be sure about our decisions, and we should have the opportunity to change what might be
happen in Unnecessary verb
apply
a
short future. Correct article usage
the
Therefore
, I agree with abortion, because we have a second chance to think about our future and the future of our baby
.Submitted by lydiagarcia.gr on
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task achievement
The essay meets the task requirements and covers both sides of the argument. However, a more structured approach, with clearly defined paragraphs for each viewpoint, would improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the introduction by providing a clearer context and thesis statement. The conclusion should succinctly summarize the discussed points and reinforce your opinion. This will enhance the overall coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main point that is logically connected to the topic. Transitions between paragraphs can be smoother to aid in the logical flow of the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the different perspectives on the topic and provides a personal opinion, which is crucial for this type of task.
task achievement
Your personal experience adds a relatable and authentic touch to the essay, making it more engaging and relevant.
task achievement
Despite some language errors, your ideas are generally clear and comprehensible. This is a good foundation to build upon for future practice.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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