Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Influencers are a big part of our society, they are public figures, who always have to appear in front of the public and
media
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, which plays an important role in their career. they are treated badly sometimes by the press,
therefore
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, it is argued that their private life should be compromised
due to
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fame or they should have some privacy in their survival. I will discuss both scenarios in
this
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essay before coming to any conclusion. On the one hand, they decided to be a public figure and it has some price. your life is no longer yours anymore,
everyone
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is looking forward to you and your actions.
For example
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, Shahrukh Khan is a very big celebrity in India, and each person follows his actions, As what he wears, what he eats, and what he does, and people follow his steps.
Thus
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, they have to be very careful in front of the
media
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.
However
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it is impossible for anyone to be perfect all the time, so it is important for them to have some of their time without
media
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, so they can relax in their own time.
On the other hand
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, each and every person has their some habits which they should not show to the world, it can sometimes badly influence others.
For example
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, There is an actor in India who used to do drugs and drink alcohol at home, someone recorded
this
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from a
neighbor's
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neighbour's
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building, and the press showcased his moments to
everyone
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. The situation got so bad, that his fans started doing the same things.
Therefore
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it is important for the
media
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to realize that
everyone
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has a private life and they don't have to disclose it to
everyone
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, it can have a bad impact on society. In conclusion, Public figures are indeed paid to be perfect and appear in front of the public, but every living being should have their privacy sometimes to relax.
Media
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should
also
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be aware of their news before showcasing anything that can impact badly others.
Submitted by MK on

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task achievement
Your essay effectively covers both viewpoints and provides a clear conclusion. However, you should work on the clarity and formality of your introduction. It would help to rephrase it for better readability and to make it more academically formal.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good logical flow, but there are some parts that could be better connected. Use more transition words and phrases to clearly link your ideas. For example, phrases like 'For instance' or 'As a result' can help guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
The main points you discussed were relevant and supported by examples. However, the examples should be more specific and deeply analyzed. Instead of just mentioning the examples, try to explain their significance in more detail to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from a clearer division of paragraphs. Each paragraph should ideally express one main idea and its supporting arguments. This will help improve the logical structure and overall readability of your essay.
task achievement
Your essay provides a balanced discussion of both views, which is crucial for a high score in task achievement. You've also given a clear opinion at the end, which strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both present and coherent, summarizing the main points well. This is important for achieving a good score in coherence and cohesion.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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