Some people think that teenage years are the happiest times of most people's live. Others think that adult life brings more happiness in spite of greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Regardless of
the
age, every person is looking out in the world to be happy. Some believe that teenage times with Correct article usage
apply
lack
of responsibilities, Correct article usage
a lack
is
the happiest moments of Correct subject-verb agreement
are
life
. In
the Change preposition
On
otherhand
, others think that Correct your spelling
other hand
adult
years, during which they are much Correct article usage
the adult
independent
Correct quantifier usage
more independent
to make
choices in Change preposition
in making
life
, bring more joy even with such
responsibilities. In this
essay , I will give the perspectives from both sides and also
tell why the former carries more weight than the latter.
The main reason why some people might view teenage
Correct article usage
the teenage
year's
as the Change noun form
years
most
happiest times is the lack of responsibilities. With Change the adjective
apply
such
freedom, they have enough time
for themselves to do the thing's
Correct your spelling
things
what
they love to do. Given the ample amount of Correct word choice
that
time
, they can use it to spend with their friends to play at the park , watch movies or have game night's
, earningChange noun form
nights
the
Correct article usage
apply
happiness
during those times . In addition
, they do not have the stress that most adult's
have Change the noun form
adults
adult
such
as to make life
decisions. Even if they have problems from school, for instance
, problems with completing their homework or some projects, they have their parents
to help them out to solve those .
On the other side, people believe that adult year's
is the best part of their Change the noun form
years
year
life
could be due to
the reason that they can pave their own road. This
is because, during their childhood, they were under the
restrictions from their Correct article usage
apply
parents
such
that they were not able to do what they enjoy
unless they Wrong verb form
enjoyed
finish
a particular task . So when they cross Wrong verb form
finished
teenage
years, they are happy to be out of Correct pronoun usage
their teenage
such
barriers and also
do what they admire like buying a new car or travelling to new places.
Although
both sides point out good views, I believe that the
Correct article usage
apply
happiness
during the teenage years overweighs
the Verb problem
outweighs
time
during adulthood. Although
its
true that they have some limitations in their Replace the word
it's
it is
decision making
, they do not have a lot of obstacles in Add a hyphen
decision-making
life
that their parents
might have. This
is because also
considering the problems of their own children, parents
as adults also
have to face and deal with many issues. As a result
, even if they have some dreams and wishes that they could find happiness
from
, they must have to keep them aside just for the sake of their family as they do not have the Change preposition
apply
time
. However
, I do believe that if adults can find a balance between their busy life
and Fix the agreement mistake
lives
also
do what they love , they can also
be truly happy.
In conclusion, while
teenagers can enjoy their life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
due to
their lack of responsilities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
as well as
the ample amount of time
they have, adults too can find happiness
if they can strike a balance between their challenging life
and Fix the agreement mistake
lives
also do
what they admire.Wrong verb form
doing
Submitted by kevinleom12 on
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grammar
While your essay addresses both views effectively, consider refining your grammatical structures to enhance clarity and coherence. This includes ensuring that punctuation is correctly placed, such as not using space before commas, and being consistent with verb tenses.
development
Develop your paragraphs further by expanding on the examples and providing more specific evidence to support your points. More detailed and varied examples would strengthen your arguments.
language use
Work on using more academic language and varied sentence structure to demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency. For instance, incorporating more complex sentences and advanced vocabulary can help achieve a higher score.
structure
The structure of your essay is clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both viewpoints, and a conclusion. This shows a good understanding of essay organization.
task response
You have effectively addressed both sides of the argument and provided your opinion, which is essential for this type of essay.
coherence
The comparison between teenage and adult years is coherent, and the arguments are logically structured.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
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