1.In recent years, the structure of a family and the role of its members are gradually changing. What kinds of changes can occur? Do you think these changes are positive and negative?
In recent years, there has been a gradual change in the organization of a family and the position of its
members
. Personally, I think these modifications are both positive and negative. I shall discuss them in more detail in this
essay
First of all, in the past, most traditional families
had several generations living together and man earned money mainly in a family however
nowadays, that has been transformed into various kinds of modern families
, like nuclear families
and one-parent families
and a woman too can earn money like a man. On the one hand, some say that these transformations have some advantages such
as making people
happier as well as
growing private level in their life because they can have the freedom to live following what they want and adapt to their situations. For instance
, after marriage, my brother chose to live in a nuclear family because my parents's house was not size enough to add more people
. This
decision made all members
of my family satisfied. And, another example is my neighbour, she married and had two children but her husband was addicted to alcohol and violence, eventually, she decided to divorce him. Consequently
, she has had a better life.
On the other hand
, it is thought that the organization of a family and its position of members
gradually alteration can have several negative effects on the life of people
such
as losing culture and having gaps between the members
of a family. To illustrate, children living in a nuclear family can not have many opportunities to connect with their grandparents, aunt, uncle, and cousin. This
not only causes to decrease in the level of closeness but also
restricts the passing of culture and knowledge from the old generation to the young generation.
In conclusion, it seems to me that the format of a family and the responsibilities of its members
increasingly vary have both the advantages of the risk of losing culture as well as
creating grap among individuals in a family and the disadvantages of having more selections for people
in family lifestyle and happierSubmitted by writingeilts on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, make sure to proofread for grammatical errors and awkward phrasings to improve readability.
task achievement
Some points lack full development and clarity. For instance, develop your ideas more clearly and consistently, especially when presenting arguments both for and against the changes you're discussing.
task achievement
Your essay thoroughly addresses the prompt, discussing both the kinds of changes in family structures and the positive and negative impacts.
task achievement
You use relevant examples to support your points, making your arguments more convincing.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, creating a sense of completeness.