IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that
first
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first-world
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world
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countries
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 should help
third
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third-world
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world
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nations
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 with generous assistance when facing natural
disasters
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.
This
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 essay will fully agree with
this
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 statement because it is human to help others when they are in need and
also
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 developed
countries
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 have the technology, resources and funding that may be of great assistance to
under developed
Correct your spelling
underdeveloped
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 ones. Developed
countries
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 have adequate monetary funds and
food
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 supplies that can sustain poor
countries
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 facing natural
disasters
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.
Firstly
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,
third
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third-world
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world
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countries
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 that are experiencing droughts, can receive
food
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 aid from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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developed
nations
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, to mitigate starvation and promote quality of life.
Secondly
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, earthquakes can destroy poor
countries
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’ infrastructure,
hence
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 it is the duty of the developed country to assist with monetary funds to rebuild the nation.
For example
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, In 2017, the country of Mozambique had terrible floods that destroyed many people’s homes and about 150 people died. Wealthy
nations
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 like South Africa, and China, assisted by providing temporary accommodation and
food
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.
Thus
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, it can be noted that developed
nations
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 have the means to assist poor
nations
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 in times of natural
disasters
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.
Moreover
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,
first
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first-world
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world
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countries
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 can offer humanitarian aid
such
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 as medical facilities and technology to assist
countries
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 experiencing natural hazards.
Firstly
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, after floods, poor
countries
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 face
outbreak
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outbreaks
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 of diseases, leading to high mortality rates,
thus
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 developed
nations
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 offer medical services to promote quality of life.
For example
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, outbreaks of diseases like cholera and malaria are a result of floods and have resulted in an increase in deaths, rich
countries
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 can provide medication to cure and treat these diseases.
Thus
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, worthy
nations
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 have a significant role to play in assisting developing
countries
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. In conclusion, since rich
nations
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 have adequate resources, I strongly agree that they should provide a helping hand with humanitarian relief to poor
countries
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 in times of natural
disasters
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. They may provide them with
food
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, clothing, medical help, shelter, equipment, and funding .

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay maintains a consistent and logical flow from one point to the next. Some parts could benefit from smoother transitions between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structure to avoid repetition and maintain the reader's interest.
task response
Your essay clearly addresses the prompt with relevant, specific examples, such as the Mozambique flood in 2017. This greatly enhances the argument you are making.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are both clear and well-structured, providing a solid framework for your essay.
task response
You've demonstrated a clear and comprehensive understanding of the topic. Your arguments are compelling and well-supported, showing strong task achievement.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Humanitarian relief
  • Infrastructure
  • Global solidarity
  • Disproportionately
  • External assistance
  • Rebuilding efforts
  • Disaster response
  • Investment in stability
  • Dependency theory
  • Responsible intervention
  • Paternalistic
  • Shared humanity
  • Sovereignty
  • Capabilities
  • Fatality rates
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