IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Access to clean water is a basic human right, Therefore every home should have a water supply that is provided free of charge, do you agree or disagree?

Being human beings, as the residents of the Earth, everyone has the right to access
water
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, but not necessarily free of
charge
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.
However
Linking Words
, it is undeniable that clean
water
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 is not simply natural
water
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 and requires
treatment
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 for household purposes. Clean
water
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 is distributed to each household through
water
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treatment
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 companies, which were built with government investment.
Moreover
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, the waste of
water
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resources
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 has always been a huge issue that needs to be addressed globally.
Hence
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, I argue that it is necessary to
charge
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 appropriate fees. Every single year, the authority invests lots of funds to enhance and develop various
water
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treatment
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 companies to treat and supply
water
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 for individuals. A large number of staff members need to be paid, and machines require maintenance costs. If we start to implement free
charge
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 of
water
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 supply, which means the costs need to be covered by other means,
such
Linking Words
 as individual income tax.
Furthermore
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, the government may shorten the funds for other investment projects, like education and healthcare, which are significant for citizens. From a family situation, there is plenty of
water
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 for daily life,
such
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 as cleaning clothes, cooking and showering. If the community does not need to pay for these expenses, it may lead to the waste of
water
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resources
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 . People's awareness of protecting
water
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resources
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 may decrease directly.
Additionally
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, a variety of manufacturers need
water
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 to be used on the production line. Providing
water
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 free of
charge
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 may not only lead to wasteful
water
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 usage among workers on the production line but
also
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 reduce the awareness of
water
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treatment
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 among some factories.
Therefore
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, I believe an appropriate charging policy is effective in managing human behaviour. In summary, I sincerely appreciate that more and more people have the cognition of protecting
water
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resources
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 to avoid wasting them in recent years.
Nevertheless
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, at present, I believe that charging for
water
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 is an essential way to promote
water
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 conservation. Concurrently, measures should be adopted to guarantee that vulnerable groups maintain access to
this
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 essential resource without undue financial burden.

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good introduction and conclusion. Make sure your main points are clear and connected. Try using linking words more often to help your ideas flow.
task achievement
You answered the question well but sweeten your arguments with more specific examples to make them more convincing. Sharing personal stories or common situations can help.
task achievement
You clearly stated your opinion and supported it with reasons.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion gave a good structure to your essay.
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