A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public. Write a letter to the company. In your letter describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team summarize the benefits of paying for the concerts say how you think the company should spend the money
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing in
reponse
to your great ideal for my town . I Correct your spelling
response
thinks
Change the verb form
think
which
any suggestions are exciting and helpful to the resident .
I would like to let you know that Correct word choice
that
sponsor
a local children's sports team Wrong verb form
sponsoring
are
the best marketing for your Correct subject-verb agreement
is
company
. These children are exciting
when they hear Replace the word
excited
this
news , you know they love basketball alot
. All the parks of my town always have a small Correct your spelling
a lot
cour
to play Correct your spelling
course
it
.If your Correct your spelling
in
company
are sponsoring, you have some logo in all the match
and a lot of people Fix the agreement mistake
matches
are
know who are you and they will buy your product .
About the concert. I hold the opinion Verb problem
will
that is
great too , there are n't any open-air concert
in my town for a year . That's Fix the agreement mistake
concerts
bored
Replace the word
boring
in
Change preposition
at
the
night and the people have Correct article usage
apply
nothings
to do. So the concert with Correct your spelling
nothing
a dance music
is a good Remove the article
dance music
a piece of dance music
ideal
for marketing , it make Correct your spelling
idea
alot
of people know about your product .
But from my point of view, any suggestions are Correct your spelling
lot
spend
Replace the word
spent
alot of8
money , but you should Correct your spelling
a lot of
chose
the first Change the verb form
choose
ideal
. Simply because the children are Correct your spelling
idea
alway
remember your Correct your spelling
always
company
, their parents too , and if this
basketball club play good
and Change the word
well
join
Correct subject-verb agreement
joins
in
a big league , your logo always beside the team. So have to Change preposition
apply
recieve
big marketing and profit. You 'll sell Correct your spelling
receive
alot
of Correct your spelling
a lot
product
and they know your Fix the agreement mistake
products
company
is a
Change the article
an
angle
sponsor .
Correct your spelling
angel
This
my
Add a missing verb
is my
oppinions
and you have to think about that. I'm looking forward to hearing from you.
Best Regards .
Mr JohnCorrect your spelling
opinions
opinion
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure all sentences are complete and structured properly. This will make your writing clearer and more professional.
coherence cohesion
Consider using more varied sentence structures. This will enhance the sophistication of your writing.
task achievement
Use more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Try to maintain a more formal tone throughout the letter. This is important for professional correspondence.
task achievement
Your letter addresses both options (sponsoring the sports team and holding concerts) and provides a preference with reasons. This is good for task response.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear opening and closing to your letter, which helps with overall structure and readability.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.